Responsibility
by AngelOfDeath07
Summary: FutureFic and AU: At the age of 17, Lucas Scott becomes a father and a decision is made but now he is paying for his mistakes. Eventual Leyton
1. Prologue

**AN/ So I know I shouldn't start another Fic since I already have one going but I couldn't resist. I got the idea from reading It's You by anniecakes13 and I also have been writing a story with a similar plot for the last 6 years... Seriously! **

**Summary: FutureFic and AU: At the age of 17 Lucas Scott becomes a father and a decision is made but now he is paying for his mistakes. Eventual Leyton. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill and the characters that you don't recognize are of my imagination. **

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**Prologue **

Fatherhood. It's supposed to be the best time of a man's life but not for me. I was dreading it as soon as I was told that my girlfriend Amy was pregnant at the age of 17, barely adults yet there is a human being growing inside of her. The first thing that ran through my mind was what am I going to do? Which was quickly followed by is it true? Is she really pregnant? Tests were made and it was official she is pregnant and it is mine. Negative thoughts clouded my mind for a long time afterwards because I knew that having this baby is life changing and I will no longer be able to pursue my dreams of being a writer and Amy will not be able to pursue her dreams of teaching. We will be devoted to this baby for the rest of our life but I still reused to let her have an abortion. This baby is still a human being.

Nine months is a long time to take care of a hormonal girlfriend on my own. Our family practically disowned us as soon as they found out. My Mum was especially livid when she heard the news since she had me at 17 and after a huge argument I moved out and Amy and I moved into the cheapest apartment we could afford.

I have to admit that once I saw my little girl for the first time my heart broke. All the anxiety and negative thoughts left my mind immediately at the sight of the most beautiful creature that I have ever laid eyes on; that we created together brought tears to my eyes. The doctor congratulated us both and handed the screaming baby to me. I took her in my arms and held her to chest and started to rock her gently but all the while I felt so scared that I would hurt her. Amy smiled up at me and after kissing her on the head I passed my daughter down to her gently. Both Amy's Mum and Dad came to greet their granddaughter but only Dan showed for me. My Mum didn't show at all and it hurt.

With each day that passed my love for her grew and I spent a lot of my free time just watching her sleep, unable to tear my eyes away her fragile form but that all changed very quickly when Amy gave me a choice, such an impossible decision that either way I looked at it I loose and with little time to decide what to do. So in the end I did what I thought was best, even if it hurt me everyday... even if I regret it everyday.

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**AN/So what do you think? Should I continue? Drop a review and let me know. **

**Deanie**


	2. Wake Up Call

**AN/ Thank you to everyone who reviewed the prologue and I know there are a lot of questions that need to be answered but they will in due time lol. Also I need to mention that Luke and Peyton have yet to meet. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill and the characters that you don't recognize are of my imagination. I also don't own Maroon 5 and their song Wake Up Call or George Forman grills** **either. **

Thud. Thud. Thud.

With each thud it felt like someone is standing on my head and smashing the side of my head in with a sledge hammer. I groaned and rolled over.

"Lucas get the door" I heard a voice from beside me murmur. I groaned louder and sat up. My head went light and my eyes blurred but I got up anyway and slowly made my way to the front door ready to kill who ever is hammering on my door at half eight in the morning.

"This better be important!" I mumbled as I pulled the door open. The sun decided at that precise moment to move out of the big grey cloud it was hiding behind and shine right into my eyes. I cursed under my breath and covered my eyes with my free hand.

"Great he is a drunken bum!" I heard someone snap. I frowned wondering who said that and looked at the two figures standing in my door way and I swear for the second time in my life my heart stopped beating. The first time was when I was told my girlfriend was pregnant and then second, this exact moment, which isn't good for me since I have a heart defect called HCM. I just stared at the girl in disbelief.

"Who the hell was at the door at this time in the morning?" I heard the woman who was in my bed call.

"Great!" The girl said while rolling her eyes this earned an elbow in the ribs from the woman standing beside her. I couldn't help but smile at the girl's actions before looking the woman beside her. She looks about 23, 24 with intense hazel eyes and curly blonde hair that is tied up in a ponytail. She regarded me with judgemental eyes before looking away.

"Luke!" I sighed and turned away from the two females standing in my doorway to see Brooke wearing nothing but one of my shirts. I also then realised that I am wearing only my boxer shorts and felt very embarrassed.

Brooke walked over to me and regarded the two visitors. I knew that I have to tell the truth now.

"Err… Brooke this is my daughter Isabella Lawson and…" I trailed off since I didn't know the blonde woman's name but before I could ask Brooke interrupted me.

"You're what?" Brooke shouted.

"You know daughter as in Lucas here and my Mum got together and here I am" Izzie replied sarcastically. "You sure know how to pick them Lucas!"

"Izzie!" The blonde woman warned.

"Excuse me!" Brooke said, hand on hip.

"You heard!"

"Izzie!" I snaped

"What!" She shouted, turning on me. It was like seeing Amy again but in a miniature version. Izzie hair colour is a lighter shade of brown then her mothers it is almost a golden colour but she has the same angry expression her mother does and still stands the same way. The only physical trait of mine that Izzie has is the same intense blue eyes.

"Lucas I need to talk you **now**!" Brooke demanded as she yanked me in the kitchen.

"You never told me you had a daughter Lucas… in all these years!"

"We have only been together for two years Brooke and that is on and off" I replied as I sat on the counter.

"So! You still forget to mention the fact that you have a daughter. Are you sure she is yours?"

I laughed and jumped down. "Have you seen her eyes?" Brooke sighed frustrated and crossed her arms across her chest, a tell tale sign that she is not happy.

"Look Brooke why don't you go home take a shower, get dressed, do what your doing and I'll talk to you later" I tried to say in the nicest way I could without making her angry with me. I didn't work. She sent me one of her death glares and walked out of the kitchen in a huff. I didn't bother chasing after her I have more important things to deal with like why my daughter is standing in my living room.

**

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**

I watched as he walked back into the living room and regarded Izzie silently. He still hasn't got changed yet which is kind of distracting to be honest when all he is wearing is a pair of dark blue boxer shorts, leaving his bare, hairless muscular chest on view._ Ok where did that just come from_? I asked myself. Im here to inform him not stare at his chest. It was like he couldn't read my mind because he looked over at me and smiled. He powerful blue eyes bored into mine as he walked over.

"Im sorry but I don't actually know your name"

I regarded him before holding out my hand. "Peyton Sawyer"

"It's nice to meet you Peyton. Im-"

"I know who you are" I interrupted as I took my hand back. He just smiled at my comment but before I could continue that Brooke woman, now fully dressed in a white shirt with black knee length skirt, looking very business like barged past him intentionally. Well it had to be since we are standing towards the side of the living room. Lucas just watched her walk towards the door and slam it behind her. I rolled my eyes and caught Izzie sniggering on the sofa. I sent her a warning look before turning back to Lucas.

"Look we need to talk!" I demanded. "Alone"

"Er... the kitchen" I walked past him and into the kitchen. His kitchen is huge and I could tell it was a man's kitchen from all the steel. Steel cabinets, fridge, oven and microwave and to top it all off a large George Forman grill sat by the microwave on his granite topped counter. I laughed and shook my head at it all.

"What?" He asked when he joined me.

"Nothing" I replied as I lent against one of the counters. He regarded me with a smile on his face.

"You like my kitchen huh?"

"Im not here to talk about your kitchen Scott this is serious!" I snapped. He laughed and opened the fridge door.

"Is that my new nickname Sawyer?" I can't believe he is flirting with me right now. _Well stop smirking then_! A voice in the back of my head demanded. This guy abandoned his thirteen year old daughter for God sake.

"Look Ive been sent here by Amy-"

"What she couldn't come here herself?" He interrupted as he bent down and started to rummage through his fridge. I glared at him but tried to fight off the mischievous little smirk that is itching to make an appearance. _He'll regret that later_ I thought.

"No she couldn't because she is ill Scott and needs you to take care of your daughter" _Ill is putting it lightly_. He stood up immediately and bumped his head on the shelf. I couldn't help but laugh at him.

**AN/Got a little Leyton there but what will Luke do now? Everything will be explained as the Fic goes on promise. **

**Deanie**


	3. Down On My Head

**AN/Ok I know I have confused a few people and I'm sorry so here is a quick summary: **

**Lucas was raised by Karen and Dan wasn't around like in the show but when Karen found out that Amy was pregnant she and Lucas had a**** huge**** fight and they stopped talking. Dan is now nice and supportive of his sons (shock) **

**Izzie is Luke's daughter and is 13 years old. Amy is Izzie's Mum and is ill (you'll find out what is wrong with her in this chapter) Peyton is a close friend of the family and was sent by Amy to tell Lucas about her condition. **

**Luke hasn't seen Izzie in 6 years and she hates him for it. **

**Brooke isn't that important so don't worry about her. Nate and Haley are still Luke's friend and they still had James. You will also find out what decision Luke was faced with in this chapter too. Anything else you are still confused about just ask and I'll happily explain. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill or any of the characters associated with it. The characters that you don't recognise are of my imagination. I also don't own Yellowcard and their song Down On My Head either. **

I rubbed my pounding head slowly and turned to Peyton. She covered her mouth in an attempt to stop laughing at me.

"…Ok firstly what is wrong with Amy?"

"She was diagnosed with lung cancer four years ago but it's getting worse" She explained, looking away. My heart skipped a beat at the news that Amy has cancer. Cancer kills and she could… I stopped that thought.

"How… bad?" I stuttered, trying to calm myself.

"Bad. She has Non-small cell lung cancer, Adenocarcinoma which was in the stage IB when they found it but she couldn't have surgery because she wasn't strong enough" She took a deep breath and I watched as she wringed her fingers together nervously. "It went away for a while but it's come back and is getting worse it's now in stage IIB… Look she's giving up, talking about death and all she wants is for you to look after Izzie"

I took a deep breath and sat on the counter. "This cant be happing… damn those cigarettes!" I snapped. Peyton just regarded me silently. In the fourteen years I have known Amy she has always smoked at least five or six cigarettes a day. I guess she started smoking more over the years. I sat forward and lent my elbow against my thigh before resting my head in my hand. Images of Amy lying in a hospital with numerous machines connected to her invaded my head.

"What about Jack?" I asked, suddenly remembering that Amy is married to a fool called Jack, who I nicknamed Jackass. Peyton laughed and shook her head.

"They got divorced three years ago but he comes around a lot to check on Amy. He won't look after Izzie" I cursed under my breath at the Jackass' actions as I jumped off the counter and walked over to the door. Izzie is still sitting on my sofa watching the music channels.

"She needs you Lucas" Peyton said from behind me. I looked over my shoulder and saw her standing close behind me.

**

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**

I pulled into the large mansion like house driveway and parked the car. My younger brother Nathan, Jamie my nephew and Dan all were standing around a basketball post, each with a ball in their hands.

"Uncle Luke!" James called as he dropped the ball and ran over to me. I laughed and scooped him up into a bear hug. Jamie has just turned five and like his father loves basketball.

"Hello son" Dan greeted as I joined him and Nathan.

"Dan" Even though Dan Scott is my father I never actually call him Dad. I suppose you wouldn't either if for the first sixteen years of your life your Dad never accepted that you existed.

"Hey, Luke" Nathan greeted with a smile. I smiled back and saw someone waving frantically from the living room.

I laughed and waved back. "Hey Hales" I let Jamie return to the game that they were playing and walked into the house to talk to Haley, my best friend of twenty three years.

"Why the long face? Did you and Brooke have another fight?" She asked as she joined me at the dinning room table.

"Yes… but that's beside the point. Izzie is town" Haley eyes grew wide and I explained the morning's events to her. She sat silently and waited until I finished before asking questions.

"Are you going to look after her?"

"I don't know what to do" Haley sighed and put her hand on mine.

"What about this Peyton woman?" She asked after a silence feel on us.

"Who's Peyton?" Nathan interrupted as he joined us. I rolled me eyes and him and turned back to Haley.

"She is just a friend of the family I think. She said Amy wants me to look after Izzie"

"Wait! Amy wants you to look after Izzie?" Nathan interrupted again.

"Who has to look after Izzie?" Dan asked as he and Jamie walked into the living room too. Jamie let go off Dan's hand and ran across the room to watch TV. I sighed, knowing I have to explain everything again.

"Izzie and a woman named Peyton arrived at my house this morning to tell me that Amy has lung cancer and she wants me to look after Izzie" Both Nathan and Dan grew silent for a moment.

"You know what you have to do son" Dan spoke up first. I didn't reply.

"I can't believe she wants you to look after her now after everything she's done!" Nathan snapped. He isn't a big Amy fan and never has been even when we were dating.

"Well let's go then" Dan stood up and called Jamie over.

"Go where?" I asked.

"My Granddaughter is in town and I want to see her" Was his only reply. Nathan and Haley both stood, nodding in agreement. I didn't have much choice but to follow them as they all climbed into Dan's SUV and made their way to my apartment. I had a feeling that this won't go down well.

**

* * *

**

I actually managed to get home before the others so I quickly entered the apartment to at least warn Izzie that the family that she hasn't seen in seven years, or never met in Jamie's case where arriving momentarily. Both Peyton and Izzie who are sat on my sofa watching TV and looked up at me as I burst through the door but before I could even open my mouth Dan interrupted me.

"Where's my Granddaughter?" Dan said as he walked past me. Izzie looked up at me with raised eyebrows before regarding Dan. Nathan, Haley and Jamie followed suite.

"My God you have grown" Dan complimented. Izzie smirked at his comment and stood up, holding out her hand.

"Hi Dan" I was actually surprised she remembers who he is and is being nice. But I guess him calling her his Granddaughter helped. Dan chuckled and pulled her into a hug. When he let go I saw him slip 10 dollars into Izzie hand before turning to Peyton.

"And you must be Peyton" Dan continued as he held his hand out to Peyton. She smiled at him and shook it while Nathan moved over to Izzie.

"Hello, Izzie" Izzie regarded him before holding out her hand.

"You must be Nathan. You have the same eyes as Lucas" Nathan laughed and nodded, shaking her hand.

"And this is my wife Haley and our son Jamie" Haley smiled and pulled Izzie into a hug.

"Whoa you got big. Last time I saw you you was a bump" Izzie joked as she greeted a shy Jamie. He hid behind Nathan's leg but shook Izzie's out stretched hand any way.

"A little heads up would be nice" Peyton whispered as he stood beside me.

I turned to her and laughed. "I tried" She rolled her eyes at me and smiled over at Izzie who is talking to Haley.

"It's nice to finally meet them all in the flesh, pictures don't really help but Jamie is so cute" I frowned at her wondering how she got pictures of Jamie since I never sent Izzie any.

"How did you see picture. I never sent any?"

"You don't but Dan does. He always sends pictures with his presents" Peyton explained before walking over to Izzie. I suddenly felt so betrayed. Dan never once told me that he sent Izzie presents, if he still does. I looked over at him and watched as he talked to Peyton and Izzie happily. Anger bubbled in my chest.

I waited until Dan was alone before I pounced on him.

"Why didn't you tell me you are keeping in contact with Izzie behind my back Dan?"

He turned around to face me and shook his head in amusement. I just annoyed me more.

"Calm down son. Just because you don't keep in contact with your daughter doesn't mean I have to too" And with that he walked back into the house. I watched the new fatherly and supportive Dan Scott in amazement.

_**Flashback **_

_Bouncing the ball once more I take a deep breath and take a shot. It went in effortlessly and a wash of relief took hook hold of me. At least basketball hasn't changed I thought to myself. _

_"Lucas" I turned to see Dan Scott watching me from the bench. Great I thought to myself this is all I need. _

_"What do you want Dan!" I snapped. _

_"I want to talk to you about Amy being pregnant" _

_"It has nothing to do with you! You lost your right to tell me what to do when you abandoned me and my Mum!" _

_He took a step closer. "I'm not here to argue with you Lucas. I just want to know your intentions towards this unborn child" I couldn't believe what I am hearing. I slammed the ball on the ground angrily and turned on him. _

_"You mean do I plan on getting it aborted like you wanted my Mum to do with me? Well no I don't! I will raise this child on my own if I have to because I__** refuse**__ to turn into you Dan!" I yelled at him, ready for his retaliation but he just chuckled and nodded his head. _

_"I'm proud of you son" He said before walking away. _

_**End of Flashback **_

That was the first time he ever called me son and the begging of the man he is today which isn't that bad really. It is better then the man who abandoned me for the first sixteen years of my life and only started to acknowledge that I existed when I joined the varsity basketball team. He just gives me the creeps sometimes.

**

* * *

**

I walked into my room quietly later that day after Dan, Haley, Nathan and Jamie left and opened the wardrobe door in search of an old sneaker box that I haven't opened in a long time.

I found it hiding right at the back and pulled it out before leaving my room and sitting on the sofa. I took a deep breath and pulled off the lid to reveal my prized possessions. Izzie's things. Her hospital tag, an old pacifier, a few baby vests, numerous pictures and the one thing that makes my heart break every time I see it. The first ever teddy bear she was given. The one I brought her.

I gingerly took the bear out of the box and looked it over. It is a dark brown colour with beady eyes and a red bow around its next, just like any other teddy. Images of a younger Izzie flashed through my mind and I closed my eyes to welcome them.

_**Flashback **_

_"Izzie… come on!" I cooed as I got onto my knees and held out my arms. A thirteen month old Izzie stood holding onto my coffee table, smiling beautifully. _

_"Come on baby girl" I encouraged as I held my arms out wider. I have been trying to get her to walk for the last month now and I have a feeling today is the day she will do it. _

_She removed one of her hands from the table but stayed put at first before taking a step and then another until she attempted to walk to me. My heart leapt into my throat afraid that she will fall and hurt herself but I still felt giddy that she is taking her first steps alone. She wobbled and held her chubby little hands out to me and with one last step she reached me without falling. I laughed and scooped her up into a bear hug and spun her around. She laughed happily… _

_**End of Flashback **_

My eyes snapped opened when I remembered what also happened that day. I tried to force it out of my head, tried to get rid of the ache in my chest but it didn't help. The memory still forced its way in.

_**Flashback **_

_Izzie laughed happily. She always loved it when I spun her around but someone knocked on the door interrupting our happy moment. I put Izzie onto my hip and walked over to the front door. I wish I never opened it because on the other side stood Amy and a tall, thin man with black hair and glasses. I smirked at his appearance and turned back to Amy. _

_"Oh my baby!" Amy exclaimed as she held out her arms for Izzie but Izzie wrapped her chubby little arms around my neck and tried to bury her head into my neck. I pulled her tiny form closer to me. Amy didn't like this one bit and folded her arms across her chest angrily. What did she expect? I thought to myself. She hasn't seen Izzie in eight months she was bound to forget what Amy looked like. _

_"What are you doing here Amy and who is your friend?" I asked referring to the nerdy looking man. _

_"I'll get straight to the point then. I want my daughter" _

_"No" I replied immediately, tightening my hold on my daughter. _

_"You can't deny me my daughter Lucas" _

_"I can until you get better" I argued. Amy suffered postnal depression a month after Izzie was born and it got so bad that Amy refused to go near Izzie and cried all the time. So I thought it was best if she moved in with her parents while I looked after Izzie. _

_"I am better that is why I'm here. I want my daughter" Amy replied sternly. Izzie started to complain and whine in my arms. I rocked her gently. _

_"Amy-" _

_"No Lucas. Look I met someone else while I was in New Jersey. This is Jack" She introduced. The nerdy looking man, Jack held him hand out to me. I scoffed at him and shoved his hand away not believing the nerve of this guy. What a jackass I though as I laughed. Izzie started to complain louder and wiggle in my arms. _

_"Look this is upsetting Izzie can we do this another time" I tried to explain. _

_"No! look Lucas I have tried to be civil about this but you give me no choice. You either give Izzie to me and you can visit her on her birthday and so forth or I take her and you will never see her again" I froze at Amy's harsh words and after regarding her I knew she is serious. _

_**End of Flashback **_

So I did what I thought was best even though either way I looked at it I loose. Izzie walked into the living room then and her eyes grew wide at the sight of me. I realised that I was still holding her teddy and stood up but she walked out of the room again without a single word or a backwards glance. I sighed deeply and sat back down.

**AN/ I hope I cleared everything up for you. Lucas' decision was to give his daughter over or never see her again. Harsh I know. By the way the nice Dan kinda creeps me out too lol. **

**Reviews and Suggestions welcome. **

**Deanie**


	4. Act A Fool

**AN/Hello everyone! Thank you for reading and reviewing! I totally forgot to mention in the last chapter that Dan never killed Keith. Keith never came back after Jules left him at the alter (Dan wasn't involved this time) but he keeps in contact with Lucas sometimes. I love Keith and hated the fact that he died :) Jimmy is still alive too but he and his Mum moved away when some bullies beat him to pulp. I hated the fact that Jimmy took his life in the show so I let him live… Prepare for a hate filled chapter **

**Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill or any of the characters associated with it. The characters that you don't recognise are of my imagination. I also don't own Ludacris and his song Act A Fool, Rihanna and her song Umbrella or ADCD and their song Highway To Hell either.  
**

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Day two of Izzie's and mine stay in the Scott's apartment. Talking of Scott he is sleeping on the couch, snoring slightly after he offered us his bedroom. He still hasn't decided if he is going to take care of Izzie or not but hopefully he will. I sighed and took the bowl from Izzie and poured the contents of the Cheerio box into it and then added the milk. Izzie walked across the kitchen and turned on the radio. Rihanna's Umbrella broke the silence.

"You can stand under my Umbrella. Ella ella eh eh eh…" Izzie sang along before looking up at me. I shook my head teasingly at her for singing along.

"What it's catchy!" I laughed and passed the bowl of cereal to her.

"Thank you"

"No problem Sugar" I replied. She jumped up onto the counter and shook her head at my nickname for her.

"You're the best Goldilocks!" I playfully glared at as I took a sip of my coffee. She smiled innocently at me before turning back to her breakfast and I returned to my sketch pad.

"Morning" I looked up to see Lucas stalk into the kitchen half asleep.

"Morning" I replied. He poured himself a coffee and lent against the counter watching Izzie silently. Izzie was too busy eating to notice or he would have got an ear full by now.

"I decided that I will look after you Izzie… if you want me to" He stammered nervously making me smile. Izzie looked up at him and shrugged uninterested. He looked over at me confused.

I chuckled. "That's fine with her" He laughed and nodded. "Well now that you have decided to look after Izzie you now have to decide where you two are going to live. Are you going to move Izzie into this apartment? Or a bigger apartment in Tree Hill? However, if you do you will need to move** all** of Izzie's thing here, get her into another school and so forth. On the other hand you could move into Amy's house in New Jersey which would save you finding Izzie a new school, you would have me living next door to help you, she would be closer to Amy but your life is here so it's up to you" I explained. Lucas just stared at me dumbfounded which made Izzie laugh and milk spray out of her mouth. Everyone cracked up laughing at that.

"Err… Just let me wake up first" Lucas said through laughter. I nodded and gave Izzie a dishcloth to clean up the sprayed milk. She thanked me and wiped the counter.

"So Scott Izzie and I are bored how about a tour of Tree Hill" I asked. Lucas looked over at me and laughed.

"I see we are still referring to each other by our surnames then" I just smirked at him. He raised his eyebrows at me, a small smile on his face.

"Fine Lawson" He turned to Izzie then back to me. "Sawyer I will give you a tour of Tree Hill"

* * *

Once we all got dressed Peyton, Eugene and I all left his boring apartment and started the tour of Tree Hill. That is what I've decided to call Lucas now because a) I know it annoys him and b) if I call him Lucas or Scott like Peyton does it means that we are on good terms and I like him when I don't. I am definitely not calling him Dad. He is no more a father then Mum's ex husband Jack the Jackass. The one thing those two have in common is that they both left. I shake my head at that.

"Come on Sugar" Peyton teased as she linked her arm with mine. I smiled at her and catch up with Eugene. Peyton is like the big sister I never had and I love her to death. She is the one person I can tell anything to, no matter how bad it is. We met the first day she moved in six years ago and Mum and Peyton hit it off immediately so she was always at our house. The older I got the more I grew to like her and confide in her, especially since Mum got ill. I fought back the aching in chest brought on by thinking about Mum's condition.

"Are you Ok?" Peyton asked, stopping me from walking. I smiled weakly at her. She could always tell when I was upset. She pulled me into a comforting hug and I wrapped my arms around her.

When we let go of each other Eugene was watching us curiously. I rolled my eyes at him and look away. I don't see why he has to look after me. _Why can't Peyton just adopt me instead of having to live with this guy_? I thought to myself as we started walking again. When Peyton told me that Mum wanted Eugene to look after me I thought she was joking since I haven't seen the guy in years and I don't actually know why he left or hasn't kept in touch like Dan does. At first I didn't mind his absence because I had Jack but Mum got ill and he left and I started to wonder but was too afraid to ask. I remember hearing Jack and Mum argue about Eugene when I was younger so I just assumed it was a touchy subject. The only time I ever brought up his name and eventually asked Mum she got upset which made her hyperventilate and all these doctors rushed over to her so I never brought his name up again, afraid it would kill her. I stopped that train of thoughts and paid more attention to my surroundings. We are all standing on a worn out basketball court that sat by a magnificent looking river. I wished I had my camera with me to add the amazing view to my scrapbook.

"I practically grew up here with my friends Skills, Junk, Fergie, Jimmy and Mouth" Eugene's word's brought me out of my daydream and I watched as he stood on the free throw line with glazed over eyes. I wondered what he was thinking about.

"Boys and their basketball" Peyton teased. I laughed and joined her on the bench, nodding in agreement. Eugene chuckled and turned to face us, his hands in his pockets.

"Well is there something you love with a passion?" Peyton and I fell silent. I don't want to tell him about my life, my hobbies. He should already know. "Basketball and literature are mine"

"Art and Music" Peyton admitted. I looked back out at the river wishing I was back home with my friends. A nudge from Peyton made me look back at Eugene.

"…Fine. Photography and Music"

"Photography" He repeated with a smile. I regarded him wondering if he remembers that Mum is crazy about photography and was forever taking pictures of me and nearly everything else that sparked her interest but after a few moments I drew to the conclusion that he doesn't.

"That's what I said" I replied dryly, getting up and breaking the silence that fell on us. He sighed and I could feel his eyes watching me, Peyton's too.

"Let's go" I said slightly annoyed. Eugene nodded and started to walk back the way we came. We walked down a long deserted road that inhabited large oak trees which shed great shadows on the road.

"So what other things are you interested in?" Eugene asked as he walked in step with me. I sighed deeply and continued to watch the shadows the leaves and branches made silently. I can tell that he is trying to spark a conversation with me but I don't particularly want to talk to him. He suddenly stopped walking and I looked over him, my curiosity getting the best of me. He looked across the road at a busy looking auto shop, the radio echoing throughout it masking the noise of tools and employee conversation. It sounded like Highway to Hell is playing.

I looked up at the sign and read it out loud. "Keith's Auto Shop"

"Keith is my uncle but he left last year and hasn't returned. Dan owns the shop now" He explained, never taking his eyes of the shop. I regarded him silently taking him in. He is taller and older then I remember, for obvious reasons but I don't remember him having a goatee or being so muscular. But I have noticed that when he is nervous he buries his hands in his pockets and he tends to wonder off into his world exactly like I do and there was me thinking we had nothing in common I thought sarcastically.

"You miss him huh?" I ask.

"Yeah. He was like a Dad to me"

"Unlike you" I mumbled under her breath and walked off ahead again. We headed for his high school next where he and Mum met but he didn't go into detail. He just said that they met at a basketball game and dropped the subject. Im guessing that Mum was one of the cheerleaders at the game he was playing.

Next we went to this amazing pier and he explained that Uncle Nathan and Aunt Haley met for tutoring session there and fell in love. I rolled my eyes at the true love, soul mates jig. I don't believe it for a second. Love is overrated. Then he took us to the building he works at but I zoned out and only heard the word newspaper. So Im guessing he works for the local newspaper and lastly he showed us the house he grew up in until he was sixteen. I never actually met my Grandmother Karen and was hoping she would be home but she wasn't. Another thing to wonder about. Why haven't I met my grandmother? Another mystery!

Eugene of course shot questions at me but I only gave him one word answers or no answer at all and in the end I got into a long conversation with Peyton about the similarities and difference between Bridgetown and Tree Hill to stop him asking me questions.

"So where about in New Jersey do you live?" He asked Peyton when we grew silent again.

"Bridgetown in Cumberland County, basically in southern New Jersey"

"Do you both live in the same street?"

"Were next door neighbours" I snapped, rolling my eyes at him. He looked away and shoved his hands in his pockets. I guess he is taking the hint and realising that I dislike him. My belly grumbled loudly and I wrapped my arms around my waist, hoping it would help.

"Hey, Eugene Im hungry!" I called to him. He stopped dead in his tracks and turned to me a hint of blush on his cheeks.

"Eugene?" He asked, looking over at Peyton. She giggled at his discomfort.

"I dont know you well enough to call you Dad" I replied looking directly into his eyes, letting him know I mean it. He looked down and his hands immediately buried deep into his pockets. Peyton shot me a warning glare but I ignored it and looked for a restaurant or even a Café close by. Looking up the road I saw a sign saying Karen's Café. _Finally_ I thought as the pleasant thoughts of food entered my mind.

"Look there is a Café up the street. Come on I'm hungry!" I demanded as I started to walk off ahead.

* * *

I watched as Izzie speed walked up the road into the direction of the Café in horror. I don't want Izzie meeting Karen full stop and I stood frozen for a moment trying to think of some way to get out of this. Nothing comes to me.

"Come on Scott!" Peyton shouted as she followed Izzie and brought me back to reality. I watched as Izzie pulled the Café door open and walked in. Peyton soon followed. I sighed and run after them, not wanting Izzie to find out about Karen and my messy past.

The bell above the door tingled and announced my presence but I was too busy looking around the Café. It hasn't changed one bit and I almost feel like I am seventeen again. That is until I caught the eyes of Karen Roe. She glared at me from behind the counter and I rolled me eyes at her.

_**Flashback **_

_Sighing I entered the house, my mind going a mile a minute with theories on how to tell my Mum while thoughts of Amy and my unborn child circled in my head. My thoughts were cut short as the light suddenly turned on blinding me. _

_"Is it true?" I jumped and looked over at the table to see Mum regarding me. I placed my hand over my heart and took a deep breath trying to calm myself down. _

_"Well?" She prompted. I knew what she was going on about immediately and from the look on her face I know she isnt in a good mood either. _

_"Yes. We went to see the doctor today and he told us she is two weeks gone" She slammed her hand on the table making me jump. _

_"How could you be so Goddamn reckless Lucas? To get a girl pregnant at seventeen years old! Are you trying to follow in Dan's footsteps?" She snapped at me. I clenched my jaw, fighting the urge to argue with her. All I want to do is sleep. I rolled my eyes and headed for the door. _

_"Get your butt back here! This is far from over!" She shouted after me. _

_"There is nothing left to say. We are keeping this child and we are going raise it together!" I shouted back before slamming my bedroom door shut behind me and collapsing on my bed. _

_"Dont make me laugh! You are not ready for a child! You are still a child yourself!" She replied coldly as my bedroom door slammed open. I sat up and faced her. _

_"You can think what you want! I am going to raise this child no matter what!" _

_"Oh really? You're ready to devote your whole life to a child huh? Are you ready to give up basketball, school, and your friends?" I didn't answer. I was too busy worrying about what Amy and I will do to think about that. "My word I cant believe I raised such a foolish child-" _

_"I learnt from the best!" I snapped, knowing that is the stupidest come back ever and is only proving her point but I didn't care. I am going to raise my child. I want it to have a proper family and a better life then I did. _

_"This is about Dan isnt it?" _

_"No! Why won't you accept the fact that I am ready to take responsibility for my unborn child? I thought you of all people would understand what I am going through" _

_"That is why I am trying to make you realize that a child is a big responsibility! I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did" I tensed and looked over at her. _

_"What like having me at such a young age?" I replied. She looked over at me but feel silent. _

_"I didn't say that!" _

_"But that's what you meant! Wasn't it?" I shouted as I stood up. She looked away and started to rearrange the items on top of my book shelf. I regarded her wondering where my supportive and loving Mum went. _

_"You jumping in the deep end over something that Dan did all them years ago isnt going to make things right. I know that you are not ready and only want to look after this child because you don't want to turn into Dan!" _

_"Damn right I don't! And I don't want Amy to turn into this bitter woman you have become either! I want her and my child to be happy and if you don't support me then I'll just do it on my own" I snapped, walking over to the door. _

_"You are a damn fool! I thought you was a mature young man who had a bright future ahead of you but your just throwing it all away" She retaliated as I reached the door. _

_"Just like you hey Ma?" _

_"Yes" I stopped dead in my tracks and turned to her. _

_"So now the truth comes out! I was all just a mistake to you wasn't I?" I asked. _

_"You wasn't planned at all and if you never came along Dan and I would have got married and be happy together!" _

_I laughed at how stupid this is sounding. "Happy? With Dan! Ha! You've seen what how miserable Deb is, how she resorted to drugs and don't get me started on Nathan! Getting **away** from Dan made them happy!" _

_"We would have been happy together but your ruined it! He left me!" She screamed at me, knocking the bookshelf so that all my books fell to the floor. _

_I shook my head at her. "Grow up!" I took one last look at the state of a woman that I once called my mother before turning back to the door and slamming it behind me. _

_**End of Flashback**_

I moved out the next day and into Amy's house. Her parents weren't too happy about that but they let me stay. I had a feeling that deep down they are happy that I am standing by Amy. Dan found out about our fight a few weeks later but only heard minor details and offered to pay the rent for an apartment. I refused since it is Dan Scott giving me money he properly would want something back.

"Over here Scott!" Peyton called from one of the booths. I snapped out of my thoughts and walked over to them with a smile. I can still feel her eyes boring holes into me but I choose to ignore her and look over one of the menus to see if they have changed too. They haven't.

"What can I get you?" Hearing her voice I looked up and caught sight of a now older looking Karen with wrinkles and greying hair. She cut her eye at me and looked at Peyton then Izzie. Her eyes grew wide and I knew she recognised her immediately. I tensed, waiting for her to make some stupid remark but she didn't she just stared at Izzie.

"…Ok. I gotta a crazy woman staring at me!" Izzie spoke up, looking at me. I laughed at her comment. The crazy part is right.

"Sorry dear… you just have grown so much" Karen said. I stood, shaking my head at her.

"Im sorry I don't remember you" Izzie replied, regarding her. I walked over to Karen and took hold of her arm, dragging her away.

"Don't you dare! We already had this conversation"

_**Flashback **_

_I quickly unbuckled my seatbelt and got out of the car before Izzie exploded with excitement. When I opened the door a very excited three year old jumped out and started jumping up and down on the sidewalk. I couldn't help but laugh at how cute she is. Her golden pigtails that she decided she wanted swayed wildly with each jump while her pink summer dress that I brought her swayed from side to side, her pink Barbie sandals clicked every time her feet bounced off the floor and into another ecstatic jump. _

_"Park, Park, Park!" She started chanting as she lifted both arms up to me, Teddy held tightly in one hand. I chuckled and locked the car before picking her up and putting her on my shoulders. She laughed happily and once I checked no cars are coming we crossed the road, heading for the local park. _

_"Park, Park, Park!" She started chanting as I put her down. She handed me Teddy and run off to play in the sandbox. I made my way over to the bench nearest the sandbox and watched her play, not knowing when I will see her again. Izzie lives with her Mum and step-Dad in New Jersey and I usually go to see her at least three or four times a month but Jack surprised Amy with a holiday on a cruise ship for four days so Amy reluctantly let me look after Izzie in Tree Hill until they got back. My phone started to vibrate in my pocket so with a sigh I pulled it out thinking it was Amy ringing for the second time this morning. _

_"Hello?" _

_"Hey Luke" Haley said. Izzie looked up from the sandcastle she is making in search of me. I waved over in her direction until her eyes met mine and with a smile she returned to her sandcastle. _

_"Hey Hales what's up?" _

_"I was hoping you can come and rescue me from Nathan" _

_"Sorry no can do. I got Izzie with me for once" I explained. _

_"So Amy finally let you look after her by yourself huh?" _

_"Yeah and that is only because they have gone on holiday. But I have her and that is all that matters. What has Nathan done anyway?" I asked, keeping an eye on a little boy that joined Izzie at the sandbox. _

_"Well I brought a new chest of draws since Nathan and I have too many clothes but it is a DIY job and Nathan decided that he will put it together himself only now he is stuck and is getting agitated" I laughed, knowing how he feels I brought Izzie a swing for her birthday and attempted to put it together myself too. _

_"He has laid everything out on the living room exactly like it is in the instruction but isn't getting any where. The only good thing about it is he is sitting topless all hot and bothered…" She trailed off. _

_"Ew! Ok Haley we are talking about my brother here" _

_"Oh yeah sorry. Look I better get going before he pops a blood vessel. Enjoy your time with Izzie" _

_"I'll bring her over later" _

_"Bye" I ended the call and looked over at the sandbox only to see it empty. I stood up immediately, my heart pounding against my chest as all sorts of scenarios run through my mind. What if someone took her? What if she fell over somewhere and is crying for me? What if she walked off with some other children? I started panic and took off in a run searching the play ground. I found her a moment later sitting on the ground with a woman beside her. Relief washed over me immediately and I ran over to her. The closer I got I realised that she has been crying and the woman standing by her is non-other then Karen Roe. _

_"Hey Honey what's wrong?" I asked, deciding to deal with my daughter before I deal with Karen. _

_"I fell off the money bars and got a boo boo on my hand" She held out her right hand to show me that the heel of her hand has a scrape on it. _

_"Aww Hon" I cooed as I kissed her hand gently. "Better?" She nodded a little. "Will Teddy make it all better?" She nodded a smile growing on her face. I smiled back and passed Teddy over. She cuddled her (Izzie demanded that Teddy is a girl) tightly before standing up and turned to Karen. _

_"Thank you lady" Karen nodded at her and watched as Izzie ran off. _

_"Be careful!" I called after her. She ignored me and started to climb up the steps that lead to the slide. _

_"What the hell are you doing!" I snapped at Karen. She has aged quite well and has hardly changed but she ignored me completely and continued to watch Izzie. I took hold of her arm and pulled her over to a bench. _

_"What she is my Granddaughter?" _

_"No she isnt! Because that would mean I am your son and actually like you when we both know I don't!" I argued. She looked away from Izzie and at me. We haven't talked in three years, since the night I left. _

_"You are my son no matter what Lucas" She snapped. I could see Izzie watching us out of the corner of my eye and decided not to argue with her right now. It will only upset Izzie. _

_"Whatever! Look you have no right to my daughter Ok! You stay out of her life she doesn't need someone like you poising her!" I said, standing up. _

_"I don't need to poison her she has you for that!" She replied. I looked down at her and shook my head. _

_"How's life alone?" I asked before walking away and over to my daughter. _

_**End of Flashback **_

We haven't spoken since well until now. I have made sure I stayed away from this Café and the cold woman standing before me. The funny thing is we see each other everyday when I drive by on my way to work but not one word is exchanged, just glares and evil looks.

"Come on Izzie" Peyton spoke up. I looked over at them and watched as Peyton stood, took Izzie's hand and lead her out. It didn't stop Izzie looking back at us though. Karen yanked her hand out of my grip. I looked back at her, staring her down.

"You just can't help yourself can you! Leave me and my family alone!" I snapped as I walked out too.

* * *

**AN/ Well firstly I apologize for taking so long to update but I had writers block and trying to decide what I am going to do at college and secondly I apologize for the first flashback it sucked. Writing an angry, Dan loving Karen was harder then I thought. Drop a review and tell me if everything else sucked too. **

**A Random fact: The other morning I was forced to watch the TV programme "Grim adventures with Billy and Mandy" and I noticed in the closing credits that there is an actual person called Brian Smith! He is the colour stylist or something like that for the show! Lol **


	5. Start From Scratch

**AN/ So I am slowly getting over my writers block. I know what I need to write and I have ideas I just get stuck. Its very annoying... anyway I'm happy that you liked the last chapter cause I didn't but that's just my opinion. So Luke is moving today and starting his new life with his daughter. I promise to start adding Leyton to the equation. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with One Tree Hill or any characters associated with the show. The characters that don't recognize are of my imagination. I also don't own The Game or his song Start From Scratch either. **

I bent down and picked up another cardboard box that littered my now empty apartment and brought it outside to my car. Peyton's trunk is already full with my left over boxes and her and Izzie's things too. I walked out of the door and to my car. Izzie stood talking to Haley, Bevin and Jamie while me, Peyton, Dan, Skill's and Junk put the rest of the boxes in my trunk. I decided to move to New Jersey it is easy for Izzie and it gives me a fresh start. I will miss Tree Hill and most of the people in it a lot but we all have to move on sometime.

"Last one" Dan informed me as I was about to walk back inside. I nodded and regarded my apartment. I have only lived in it for two years but it was still home. I waited until everyone has gathered before I said my goodbyes. Dan stepped forward first.

"Good luck Son" He said, pulling me into a bear hug. "Keep in touch" I nodded and moved on to Skills. Skill's held his hand out to me which I took and he pulled me into a manly hug.

"Miss you Dawg"

"Yeah you too. Look after the family" I replied, letting go. Skills and Bevin got married two years ago and she is expecting her first child. A little girl. Bevin tried pulling me into hug next which was quite hard considering she is six months pregnant and is big now. I laughed and kissed her cheek.

"Miss you too Bevin" She blushed and blew a kiss to me.

Nathan took a step forward with Jamie in his arms and held out his hand, going for the manly approach. I shook my head at him and pulled them into a tight hug.

"Take care of yourself big brother" He said, patting me on the back. I nodded and let go off him. Jamie held out his arms for me. I smiled at picked him up.

"Take care of the family" I said to Nathan.

"Bye Jamie. Keep playing" I said to Jamie who has been quiet all day. He nodded and hugged me tightly then held out his arms for his father. I smiled at him and gave him back to Nathan before turned to Haley. Now for the hard part, not like saying goodbye to my friends and family is hard but I know that Haley will cry and get upset which will make me get upset and I really don't want to cry.

Haley stood beside Nathan with tears in her eyes. I sighed deeply and held out my hands to her. She started sobbing and wrapped her arms around me tightly.

"Don't cry, Hales. We'll still talk everyday and you can come and visit anytime you want" She nodded silently, soaking my white shirt but I didn't mind.

"It won't be the same. I'll miss you Scott" She whispered. I pulled her closer and held her for a moment before letting go.

"I'll miss you too, Haley James-Scott" She wiped her eyes and smiled weakly at me.

Brooke entered my head unexpectedly but I knew she wouldn't come to say goodbye she isn't talking to me and is at work right now but the weird thing is that I don't mind. I thought I would be upset or at least mad about it but I'm not. I'm excited to move to New Jersey and make up for the lost time with my daughter and get to know Peyton more. There is something about her that I can't quiet but my finger on but she is a funny girl and I love how protective and motherly she is of Izzie.

Someone nudged me and looking over I saw Peyton standing beside me. Her hair is tied up again and she is wearing a Nike hoodie that I lent her since the black leather jacket she wore yesterday got filthy when Izzie and Jamie decided to have a water and mud fight and Peyton got stuck in the middle.

"Well I guess its time we go going" She said. I looked over at my family and friends and with a sigh I nodded.

She lent into me slightly and whispered "Don't cry Scott" before walking over to her car where Izzie already sat in the front passenger seat.

I shook my head at her and walked over to my car and with one more look at the other I waved and got in. Peyton started the engine and with a honk of her horn started to drive away. I followed watching everyone wave at our retreating cars through my rear view mirror.

**

* * *

**

Eight, maybe nine hours later we arrived in Bridgeton and outside Amy's house. Finally. After we got stuck in traffic in New York and then I got lost again a few moments ago not realising how long Westwood Avenue is.

"Took you time!" Peyton teased as she took the last box out of her trunk and brought it over to the house.

"Can I go now?" Izzie complained when I got out. She lent against Peyton's car with her arms folded, obviously sulking.

"Yes!" Peyton called from the house. Izzie smiled and speed walked out of the driveway and down the road. I watched her leave, clueless to where she was going. I was about to call after her when Peyton answered for me.

"Don't worry she is going to her friend Zoë's house. She lives down the road and has been driving me nuts with her constant calls for the last three hours. Besides Izzie will just complain about packing and how much she hates us if we don't let her go. I told her to come back in an hour" I nodded. At least Peyton knows where Izzie is that's fine and she is right about complaining during unpacking.

"You don't have to help me unpack. I can do it" I told Peyton as I picked up a box.

"You packed everything I might as well help you unpack and anyway you don't know where anything is" She walked ahead and towards the house. I followed and looked at Amy's house in amazement. It is huge, way bigger then any house or apartment I have ever lived in. I looked as big as Nathan and Haley's house back in Tree Hill but older, more defined.

"So which house in yours?" I asked when we went back for the last boxes. She pointed to the house on the left. I noticed that most of the houses look the same but not Peyton's and Amy's both their houses are painted a light blue colour while the other are all white. _At least this way I can't forget where I_ live I thought with a smile.

"Ok. So I'll show you where you room is and help you unpack" We walked up the wooden stairs and into the second door. _I'm guessing that this is Amy's room_ I thought looking around. Peyton put the box she was carrying on the floor and I started going through them. Peyton soon followed.

"You have a lot of books Scott!" She spoke up some time later. I was unpacking the boxes that held my clothes. "One…" She trailed off counting the boxes. "Twelve boxes full of books! You book worm!"

I laughed and stood up. "Hey! There is nothing wrong with being a book worm!"

"If you say so" I looked over at the door to see Izzie and a black haired girl standing there.

"Hello Izzie and…"

"Zoë" The girl says, holding out her hand. "You must be Eugene"

I groan and look over at Izzie. She smirks at me but stays silent.

"It's Lucas" I say shaking her hand.

"Oh. Well I like Lucas better then Eugene. Eugene is a stupid name, like a Granddad's name or something" Both Izzie and Peyton burst out laughing and I can't help but smile at the girl's bluntness.

"Well it's my middle name but… thank you for being honest" She nods.

"So… this was lovely! Bye!" Izzie says quickly, dragging Zoë away. I look back at Peyton to see her trying to hold back her laughter.

"Izzie has great friends!" I joke. Peyton laughs harder.

"I think she likes you" I laugh and nod. _I just need to get my daughter to like me_ I think to myself as I put another book in the book shelf not noticing that Peyton has left the room.

"I ordered Pizza" She informs me. I smile, knowing that I could smell something along the lines of Pizza.

"Nice" I reply, standing up and following her into the living room. My mouth drops out at the sight of it. It is huge, bigger then Nathan's. I quickly snap out of it and grab a slice of plain cheese with a smile. Izzie and Peyton are sitting to my right giggling away and I don't attempt to understand what at. I just sit beside Izzie.

"Hello, old man Eugene!" Izzie teases before her and Peyton burst out laughing again. I shake my head at them both, trying to fight the smile that is growing on my face.

**AN/ So I went on this website to see what the distance is from Wilmington to Bridgeton in a car and the website said it takes approximately 6.4 hours at 60 mph in a car I just added time to it. Also I don't think Eugene is an old man's name but my younger brother does lol. **

**Reviews and Suggestions always welcome **

**Deanie.**


	6. Truth Hurts

**AN/ Heeeelllloooo! I'm glad that everyone likes Izzie. I love writing her and I love writing Peyton and Izzie's relationship too: P So here is the next chapter and I'm going to shut up! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with One Tree Hill or any of the characters associated with the show. The characters you don't recognise are of my imagination. I also don't own Usher or his song Truth Hurts either. **

_Ok_ I thought to myself as I looked at the stupid machine again and scratched my head confused. I pressed the ON button and one of the lights flashed continuously only confusing me more. I groaned and looked over all the buttons again, too afraid to press the wrong one.

"What are you doing?" I looked over at the kitchen door to see Peyton leaning against it, an amused smile on her face. I blushed not wanting to ask her for help on how to use the washing machine but from the look on her face I guess she already knows I'm having trouble. I looked down and put my hands in my pockets to try and hide my embarrassment.

She laughed and entered the kitchen fully. "You look just like Izzie then" I looked up and smiled at her. She smiled back and walked over to the washing machine.

"I can't believe a grown man like yourself can't use a washing machine" She teased as she opened the draw to see that I put fabric softener in. I'm not completely stupid and actually managed to find the draw and put the softener in the right section.

"Come here Scott!" I walked over to her and stood close behind her. She looked over her shoulder at me, making sure I was watching before she pushed a few buttons and then a small rectangular button and stopped. I took the time to look her over quickly, taking in the smell of lavender in her hair.

The washing machine suddenly jumped to life and I could hear the water starting to fill the machine. She turned to me and shook her head as she put space between us. I start to worry that she could feel me watching her and hoping that I didn't freak her out but the smile on her face told me that I hadn't.

"What! I know how to use** my** washing machine this one is just confusing!" She nodded slowly, not believing a word. I couldn't help but laugh at her.

"So, Scott can you use a microwave, toaster, dryer too?"

"Shut up!" She both laughed at each other. She stood on one side and I stood on the other.

"Are you ready?" Peyton suddenly asked. I shook my head. We are going to see Amy in the hospital but I'm very nervous about how she will react to seeing me.

"Eugene your crap is here!" Izzie interrupted as she entered the kitchen. I nodded, trying to keep my face natural as I left the kitchen.

**

* * *

**

"Izzy, will you cut it out!" I removed my head from the inside of the fridge and looked over at Peyton. She lent against the counter, arms folded, stern look on her face. I rolled my eyes and went back to looking in the fridge for something to eat.

"Izzie I mean it! He is your father you can't keep treating him like that"

I slammed the fridge door shut. "Don't call him that!"

"Why not? He is you're biological father right? So there for he is you're father"

"Biological or not **he **still left, **he **didn't keep in contact and** he** didn't give a crap about me before so I don't give a crap about him now!"

Peyton sighed deeply. "He cares now Izzie. He is here right now for you"

"Yeah, six years too late" I shouted back. "Can we not talk about him?"

"No. We need to have this conversation some time"

"Not now we don't" I replied, trying to walk out of the kitchen but Peyton grabbed hold of my arm and pulled me back in.

"Yes we do. Isabella listen to me! Everyone makes mistakes. That's just what we do. Ok he left you and Amy and you didn't keep in touch for six years. But he is here right now trying to make up for the lost time and trying to get to know you but you being stubborn and horrible to him doesn't help matters!"

"It's not like he had a choice! If Mum hadn't of got ill and we never went to see him he would defiantly not be living here right now and you know it!" I argued back. I could feel myself getting angry and I didn't want to take it out on Peyton we have never argued before but yet here we are right now arguing over him. It just made me dislike him more.

"Ok" She paused. "Let's say Amy never feel ill. Are you really telling me that deep down you wouldn't wonder about him, want to know why he hasn't kept in touch. Wouldn't you want to meet him?" She asked calmly.

I looked up at her and thought about it. _I'll admit that I have wondered why I haven't seen him in six years and why he doesn't care but I came to the conclusion that if he doesn't care then I don't either. _

"No. The way I see it is he left, he didn't contact me and I don't want him to get to know me because he **has** to" I explained the best way I could. Peyton looked at me sadly. "...Ok I admit that I would wonder but I just have to remind myself that he didn't want me and he doesn't care so why should I?"

We stood in an uncomfortable silence for a few minutes until I saw Eugene standing at the kitchen door shocked. I knew that I hit a nerve and looked away from his sad face, fighting the sinking feeling.

"Is that what you think? That I don't care?" I didn't answer. "Izzie I always cared! No matter where you was, even if you hadn't heard from me it didn't mean I didn't love you" I swallowed the lump in my throat and looked down at the floor.

"I am so sorry that I haven't kept in touch but your mother and I wasn't exactly seeing eye to eye and every time we fought you got upset…" He took a deep breath and run his hand through his hair. "So I stopped coming up to see you and we just… grew apart I guess" He tried to explain.

Tears came to my eyes as memories forced their way into my head. They weren't in sequence but images of them shouting and swearing at each other flashed past as quickly as they came and a tear managed to roll down my face. I quickly wiped it away, hating the fact that I'm crying over something that happened years ago. Eugene took a step towards me but I took a step back. His hands went into his pockets again.

"Go to the hospital" I told him as I left the kitchen.

**

* * *

**

I didn't want to leave but after a few moments I thought I'd better. Izzie needs to know the truth and I want to talk to Amy before I say anything.

We dropped Izzie at Zoë's house since she didn't want to come with us and drove to the hospital in silence. As soon as I exited Peyton's car my heart started beating faster and faster. I took a deep breath and straighten out my shirt. Peyton walked around her car and towards me.

"Are you ready?" She asked sadly. I shook my head but still followed her inside and we made our way to her room silently. I looked around the hospital watching all the people rush by, heading for their own destination to prepare myself, to delay the time that I will have to see her. Peyton put her hand on my shoulder and I nodded.

"You'll be fine" She whispered. I put my hand on hers before grabbing the door handle and walking in. Her room is large with sterile white colours like most hospital rooms but she gets her own which is good. I reluctantly looked over at the bed and at Amy. My heart dropped at the sight of her. She is so pale and skinny with tubes coming out of her arms and chest, her once chocolate coloured eyes are now a dull brown looked up and met mine.

She took a deep rasping breath and whispered "Lucas Scott" I smiled at her and sat in the chair beside her bed, swallowing the lump in my throat.

"Amy Lawson" She chuckled a dry humourless laugh that made my heart sink but I just tried to keep smiling at her. She lifted up her hand and I took it, squeezing it a little. It felt good to see her again after all these years I just wish under different circumstance. The news of her condition still hurts.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked after a prolonged silence. I was sounding like a child but I didn't care.

She took another deep breath "I had Jack and you were mad at me"

"I was… but you always have a place in my heart" She watched me silently.

"I'm sorry I hurt you" She whispered teary eyed. I lifted her hand up to mine and kissed it, never taking my eyes of the fragile woman who lies before me.

"God you still should have told me. I would have come here straightaway"

"I know" Was her only answer and I almost didn't hear it. She looked away and at the cards that sat on top of her bedside table. I looked over too to see numerous Get Well Soon cards. The heart monitor beeped rhythmically in the background.

"It hurt to hear of your condition from Peyton... To hear you have…" I couldn't say it. To say it meant that it was true, that I was losing her and I don't want to admit it, I refuse to.

She looked back at me and into my eyes. "I'm dying Lucas-"

"Don't say that" I argued. Pain stabbed at my heart and tears stung my eyes.

She took another deep breath and I started to wonder if it hurt her to breath "Its true and we all know it is…that is why I sent Peyton to explain everything… and ask you to take care of our daughter when I'm gone" I let go of my her hand and linked my fingers together before placing them on top of my head, fighting the ache in my chest. The way she spoke about it like she was giving up. It hurt so badly.

"I will" I averted my eyes and looked out the window.

"I know you will. You were always a good father Lucas" I cleared my throat, trying to get rid of the lump that now has turned into a bolder in my throat. "I want you and Peyton in her life, especially Peyton… she has been more of a mother to Izzie then I have for the last two years" I looked over at the door and I could see Peyton pacing outside.

"She loves that girl like a daughter-" She started crying and I squeezed her hand tightly and with another deep breath she spoke again "-And I want you to get to know Izzie, make up for all the lost time… She needs a father and Peyton will be her mother. I don't want her put in a foster home, understand?" I nodded, unable to speak, tears rolled down my own face. I can't believe I am sitting here talking about this.

"I need to talk to you about Izzie actually she hates my guts and I want to tell her the truth about everything -"Amy held up her hand to stop me.

"Tell her" She said breathlessly.

"Everything?" She nodded slightly. "Ok" She regarded me signalling me to come closer. I got up from the chair and she held her arms out to me. I smiled weakly and hugged her gently.

"Goodbye Lucas" She whispered in my ear. I kissed her cheek and walked to the door without looking back. As soon as the door closed behind me I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding and tried to fill my lungs again, it feels like someone is standing on my chest.

A hand touched my shoulder and I knew it was Peyton. I wiped my eyes and turned to her. She pulled me into a tight hug and I wrapped my arms around her too, feeling all the tension drain away.

**AN/Sorry for the lack of Leyton but I'm just trying to get Izzie and Lucas on good terms first but Leyton will be coming soon. **

**Reviews and Suggestions are always welcome **

**Deanie**


	7. Unsaid Things

**AN/ Bonjour (I got bored of writing hello)! Thank you everyone who reviews and helps with my bad grammar. I apologize. Now on with the chapter… **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with One Tree Hill or any of the characters associated with the show. The characters you don't recognise are of my imagination. I also don't own McFly or their song Unsaid Things either. **

"Thank you" I said to Peyton as she placed a coffee in front me. She nodded and took a seat beside Izzie who is watched me, patiently waiting. I took a sip of my coffee to calm myself. I can't help but feel that I'm on trial or something by the way they are both watching me. I decided to tell Izzie everything I'm just worried about telling her about Amy's depression.

"Your mother and I met at a basketball game. She was the head cheerleader and I was the co-captain of the Ravens. I always liked her but never had the guts to go up to her so after a lot of encouragement from Haley, Skills, Mouth… about everyone but Nathan. He never liked Amy because she turned him down in freshman year and he can hold a grudge" Izzie smiled a little but stayed silent.

"I nervously walked over to her after the game and asked her if she would like to come to Nathan's party with me. She smiled and agreed and we went together. We danced, had a good time and I walked her home" I tried to keep the smile of my face and continue but Peyton interrupted me.

"What happened?" I looked over at her and felt myself blush. She regarded me intently as she drank her coffee. Izzie looked from Peyton to me and pulled a face.

"Ok. I'm not sure I wanna know now" Izzie said.

I laughed and tried to hide my embarrassment. "Nothing like that! We just kissed. It was a goodnight kiss" I lied. A good night kiss with tongue. I quickly changed the subject.

"Anyway Amy started to hang around with me and my friends and was forever taking pictures of either us or random things like a tree or the river… and a week later I asked her out and she started taking more pictures but of our hand, my lips, and her lips, what we ate…" I trailed off at Izzie's glassy eyes. Peyton rubbed her back slowly and nodded at me to continue.

"Er… we went out for a year before she fell pregnant with you"

_**Flashback **_

_Ring. Ring. Ring. _

_I groaned and rolled on my side to look at the time. Seven thirty. Who the hell is ringing me at seven thirty in the morning? I thought as I picked up my phone. _

_"Hel-" _

_"Lucas I need you right now!" Amy demanded before she ended the call. I sat up and stared at my phone confused before I darted from my bed, still dressed in my boxer shorts and a T-shirt and got into my car, fearing the worse. _

_I quickly parked the car and jumped out, running for the door. It swung open just as I was about to knock to reveal Amy holding something out to me. I looked at her confused before I looked at the object in my hand. A pregnancy test. My heart leapt and looked back at her excited. She smiled at me widely and I know from the joyous look on her face that she is pregnant. _

_"Omigod!" I shouted picking her up and kissed her passionately before spinning her round overjoyed. _

_**End of Flashback **_

"The next day we went to the doctor and he confirmed it. We just had to tell our parents" I looked over at Izzie who smiled at me.

"I bet that didn't go down well" Izzie said. I laughed and shook my head.

"We told Amy's parents first. Her Dad threatened me and then chased me around the Living room while her Mum wouldn't stop crying and hugging Amy" Both Peyton and Izzie burst out laughing.

"I told Keith next while he was at work. He was holding a spanner at the time and I thought he was going beat with me it from the look on his face but he suddenly started laughing and hugged me and then said my Mum is going to kill me. He was very encouraging!" We all started laughing again. "We both told Haley and the others and they had the calmest reaction that didn't involve threatening my life or telling us we are stupid"

"What about Dan and Karen?" Izzie asked. I averted my eyes from Izzie and sipped my coffee.

"I didn't want to tell Dan since I never liked him before. You see Dan abandoned Karen when he found that she was pregnant with me and acted like I didn't exist until I was sixteen. When he found out about you he said he was proud of me and started acting all fatherly" I explained to Izzie.

"And Karen? She was the woman in that Café right?" I sighed deeply and run my hand threw my hair.

"Yeah. Karen and I had a huge fight when she found out and we don't talk anymore. I moved out of Karen's house and into Amy's and a week before you were born we moved into an apartment"

"I bet you were a cute baby Sugar" Peyton said, hugging Izzie. Izzie rolled her eyes playfully.

"You were the cutest little girl I've ever seen" I told Izzie. She blushed and looked down at the table, a small smile on her face.

_**Flashback **_

_"I'm late, I'm late, I'm late, I'm, late!" I shouted as I ran through the hospital. The baby is early and she isn't suppose to be here for another three more weeks so I went to Charleston with Nathan to see a basketball game. I skidded to a stop as I found the right delivery room and opened the door. Amy sat up in her bed with her knees propped, she looks so tired. _

_"Amy!" I called as I ran over to her and took her hand. She smiled at me and squeezed my hand. _

_"Excuse me Sir, you can't be in-" _

_"I'm the father!" _

_"He's the father" Amy and I both told the nurse. _

_"Well in that case, please follow me" She replied as she started to walk away. I watched her leave confused. I'm supposed to be with Amy. _

_"Hun, hurry up!" I looked back at Amy who nodded. _

_"I'll be right back" I told her and with a kiss on her forehead I reluctantly walked back out of the delivery room only to find the nurse has disappeared. I groaned in frustration and looked up the corridor for her. _

_"Put these on" I turned around to see the nurse again but holding out what looks like scrubs to me. I quickly pulled on the apron-scrub thing and ran back to Amy's room. _

_"I'm back" I announced, kissing her forehead. _

_"W-What took you so long?" _

_"I'm sorry the traffic was bad coming back to Tree Hill and I turned my phone off for the game" I explain, feeling embarrassed. Amy shook her head at me before she started crying out in pain. I took her hand and looked at the doctor for help. _

_"She's fully dilated" He said to the nurse beside her. _

_"Ok Hun, its time to push" The nurse who gave me the apron-scrub thing to me said. Amy sat up and everyone started talking at once. The doctor talked to the other nurse, the nurse who told Amy to push is saying encouraging words to Amy and I was trying not to scream out in pain from the death grip Amy has on my hand. _

_"Ok, one big push!" the doctor shouted. I tensed preparing myself for the death grip to get tighter. It did and I let out a little cry of pain. _

_"The head is out" _

_"Thank God" I replied thinking it was all over. It wasn't Amy was made to push one more time and I felt her nails dig into my hand as she cried out in pain again. A moment later there was a shrill cry and a smile came to my face. I looked down at Amy who is now red in the face and sweating buckets and kissed her while stroking her hair with my good hand, she still hasn't let go of the other. _

_"You were amazing" I complimented. She smiled weakly at me and lay back. _

_"Congratulations! You have a beautiful baby girl" The doctor announced. I stared at him for a moment in shock. She's actually here, right now. _

_"Here you go Hun" I looked over at the nurse who is holding out the baby to me. My heart leapt as she put the still crying baby in my arms. I panicked thinking I would drop her as I looked down at her little face. I suddenly felt overwhelmed and started to cry myself but I didn't care. I held the baby closer to my chest and rocked her gently. _

_"H-Hello baby girl..." I looked up at Amy and said the name that suddenly came to me. "Isabella?" Amy smiled happily and nodded. I lent forward and kissed Amy before turning back to my daughter. "Hello Isabella Lawson" _

_**End of Flashback**_.

"I still have the scar from Amy digging her nails into my hand" I said, showing them the scar just underneath my middle fingers knuckle and index finger knuckle. Izzie laughed and looked back up at me.

"I can't believe you choose my name"

I chuckled and nodded. "It suddenly came to me when I first held you and me and Amy never actually decided on a name"

"Oh thanks" Izzie teased.

"Well Isabella is better then baby girl right?" I asked through laughter.

"True. So what happened after I was born?" I looked down at my coffee cup and away from Izzie's happy face. I know as soon as I tell her about Amy's depression or the fact that she was absent for almost ten months of her life will upset her.

"Um… we both raised you together at the apartment…" I trailed off and took in Izzie's happy face for a moment. "But you had just turned a month old when Amy started crying and at first I thought nothing of it but as time went on she… wouldn't go near you anymore and cried all the time. I tried to get her help but she kept pushing me away… So by the time you were three months old I told her to go live with her parents who had moved to New Jersey until she got better" I watched as Izzie's face dropped and she frowned at me confused.

"I didn't know at the time that she had postnal depression and she ended up staying in Jersey for nine months. I raised you with help from Haley, Nathan and Dan until you were thirteen months old and Amy came back. She didn't come back alone though. She came back with Jack and demanded that I give you to her or I would never see you again" I explained, noticing that my voice started to get quieter. I could feel Izzie's eyes on me but I couldn't bring myself to look up at her.

"Nine months" She whispered but the kitchen was so quiet that everyone heard it. I took a deep breath and looked up at her. Silent tears rolled down her face and the moment my eyes met hers she stood up.

"Iz-"Peyton tried to say. She looked like she was about to burst out in tears any second.

"No!" Izzie sobbed as she ran from the kitchen. Peyton and I both stood but Izzie was long gone.

**

* * *

**

I ran to my room and collapsed on my bed. Lucas' words ringing in my ear. Nine months! She left for nine months and then just suddenly came back demanding that Lucas gives me up or he never see's me again. Who does that? That's just… sick!

Guilt suddenly worked its way it and I buried my head under my pillow. All this time I've been mad at him, called him bad names when he was the one who looked after me when Mum left and I bet he fought her to keep me too.

I wiped my eyes and sat up to look for my phone. It sat by my school bag so I got up and walked over to it. One person came to mind at a time like this. I flipped it open and dialled his number.

"Hey"

Hearing his voice made the tears start up again. "…I…I-" I tried to say through sobs.

"I'm coming" He replied quickly.

**

* * *

**

I stopped at the door and bit down on my bottom lip, trying to hold back the tears that are threatening to roll down my face. I wanted to chase after Izzie and hold her but I knew that she wants to be alone.

I heard Lucas sniff to the side of me and I turned slightly to see him resting his forearm on the wall and his head against his forearm. He sniffed again and wiped his eyes before pushing himself away from the wall and running his hand through his hair. I took a hacked breath, fighting the overwhelming emotions that are rising in my chest.

"I'm sorry" I whispered. "All this time I thought you were… I'm s-sorry" He looked over at me and tears started to run down my face. I looked down at the floor and started to wring my fingers.

A hand touched my shoulder then another before he pulled me into a hug. I hugged him back immediately and rested my head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around me and started to run his hand through my hair with a weary sigh.

"Shhh…Peyt its fine" He pulled me away from him and held me at arms length. I looked up into his eyes and felt an instant connection between us that made my heart leap. He moved forward slightly and before I knew what was happening I closed the space in between us and kissed him lightly. It wasn't until he kissed me back that I realised what I had done and pushed him away.

**AN/ I tried to cut down on the flashbacks since I keep using two in the chapters but you'd have to let me know if you like them or not and I know the crying on shoulder kiss has been used a lot but I was listening to Maybe Tomorrow when I was writing the end and I couldn't help myself. **

**Reviews and Suggestions are always welcome **

**Deanie**


	8. A Place For My Head

**AN/ Hello Clarice! (Insert evil laugh) sorry Silence Of The Lambs was on TV and I**** love**** that film! But enough about Hannibal… Thank you everyone who reviews and helps with my bad grammar. I apologize in advance. **

**P.S Sorry kaligator she didn't ring Jack but you'll find out who she did ring in this chapter. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with One Tree Hill or any of the characters associated with the show. The characters you don't recognise are of my imagination. I also don't own Linkin Park or their song A Place For My Head either. **

Waiting. I hate waiting but here I am standing in the kitchen trying to decide on what to eat to distract myself from waiting for Peyton. I have a feeling she is avoiding me. She usually comes over in the morning and I know that it is only midday but I just have this sinking feeling that she doesn't feel the same way I do or is regretting our kiss, as great as it was. I sighed and shook my head at how ridiculous I am.

At the sound of a car door closing I darted to the window and looked out, completely forgetting that I was hungry a second ago only to find that no one was out there. _I'm going nuts_ I thought to myself as I lent against the counter.

I shook my head and collected the peanut butter, a knife, the bread and margarine. I was about to spread the peanut butter on my piece of toast when I saw someone exit the house next door. Peyton's house. I looked over to see Peyton and a tall, thin, brown haired man walk beside her. I frowned, not realising that my grip on the knife intensified. They stopped at the end of her path and started talking to each other before the man pulled Peyton into a hug. My chest heaved heavily from annoyance and anger and my heart beat started to pound in my ears. I watched them let go of each other and the guy walked towards his mustang convertible. Not only does he get my girl but he also has a kick ass car. I hate him!

I stormed over to the table and collapsed in a chair while devouring a slice of toast. Images of Peyton and that man run through my mind on a loop. It just made me angrier. At the sound of someone clearing their throat I look up to see a timid Izzie enter the kitchen. The sight of her makes a smile spread across my face. She smiles back and sits opposite me quietly spinning her phone on the table. I watch her for a moment remembering that I told her the truth last night and she fled in tears.

"Did you fight for me?" She unexpectedly asks. Her eyes flick from her phone to me quickly before she looks down at her hands again. I put down the slice of toast I was eating to give her my full attention.

"I wanted to but I was too afraid that if we went to court I could loose you so I told Amy that I would give you to her on one condition. I was aloud to see you whenever I wanted" I explained. "It just didn't work that way" I fought the sinking feeling in my chest as I remembered having that conversation with her. She said I could come and see Izzie when I wanted, I made her promise but she didn't live up to it.

I looked back down at my unfinished slice of toast but I just lost my appetite and with a loud sigh I got up and put it in the bin. Izzie stayed at the table and continued to have a staring match with her phone. _Brooding just like her father_ I thought with a smile.

"But that's all in the past now. Its time to look forward to the future" I announced trying to lighten the mood. Izzie nodded slightly but I wasn't entirely sure I she just heard what I just said. I opened my mouth to try and comfort her in some way when her phone rang. A huge grin spread across her face and she quickly answered it.

**

* * *

**

"Hey" Aaron my best friend of eleven years said.

"Hello"

"So how are you feeling now?"

"A little better" I replied. He came over last night after I rang him and we walked around for what felt like forever where I cried and he listened, we hugging every now and then but I wouldn't want to be with anyone else. Lucas looked up at me and watched me curiously. "One second" I told Aaron before removing the phone from my ear.

"I've got to go Peyton and I am going to see Mum" I quickly explained. He nodded and with a quick wave I let the kitchen and carried on my conversation with Aaron.

"Have you talked to your Dad since?" I opened the front door just as Peyton walked up our driveway.

"I just did"

"Good. Are you going to see your Mum too?"

"In a minute. I don't know what to say to her after everything that has happened" Peyton smiled at me and I smiled back before following her to her car.

"You'll be fine. She is still the same woman she has always been"

"Apart from the fact that she practically kidnapped me!" I snapped but immediately regretted it. Aaron stayed silent. I guess he is use to my moody moments. Peyton looked over at me confused but I didn't bother explaining and got into the car.

"Ok. So she did demand that your Dad passed you over and she did leave but she came back. It doesn't matter"

"Of course it matters!"

"Izzie" He calmly said. I sighed deeply and gave in. I could never understand how Aaron stayed so calm with me.

"Ok. Fine I'll admit it isn't something to hate her forever for but it still hurt"

"I know" There was a pause where I heard him talking to his Dad. "Iz just try and stay calm and ring me later ok."

"Ok. Bye"

"Bye" I ended the call and sat back. Peyton looked over at me and I knew she wanted to ask who I was talking to so I put her out of her misery.

"It was just Aaron. He called to see how I was" I grumbled, knowing how she would react and just like she always does a cheeky smirked started to pull at her lips. Both Peyton and my Mum have this theory that Aaron and I will get married one day which I ridiculous since we are like brother and sister but try telling them that. I shook my head at her but my actions only made her smirk grow and her eyebrows rise playfully.

"Shut up Goldilocks!" I teased. She chuckled and turned on the radio.

When we arrived at the hospital a tension hung over us. I was both nervous and annoyed at Mum but I don't know what is wrong with Peyton. She has been quiet since we got within fifty feet of the hospital. I exhaled slowly to calm myself while I linked my arm with Peyton's. As Mum's door came into sight I let go of Peyton and turned to her. She nodded and I walked into Mum's room. A nurse stood by Mum's bed checking the machines and so on.

"Hello honey" I heard Mum say. I took a seat and looked at her. She looks very pale and thin today not to mention frail like if she to cough she'd break into a million little pieces or something. She removed the air mask thing and smiled weakly at me. My heart dropped at the sight of her.

"What's wrong?" I averted my eyes away from Mum and at the nurse who now has Mum's clipboard and is currently writing something down. I watched silently waiting for her to leave.

"Take it easy today ok Miss. Lawson" The nurse finally said and then left.

Mum takes a deep breath "What is wrong Izzie?" She asked again but sterner.

"Well let's see… you wouldn't go near me, you cried all the time, left for nine months, brought Jack back and demanded that Luke had to give me away! But other then that I'm fine!" I replied sarcastically. Mum lay silent for a moment regarding me before taking a deep breath using the mask.

"I'm sorry I left Izzie. I was very depressed and Lucas suggested that I went to live with parents here. I never intended to meet Jack and to fall in love with him. I still had feelings for Lucas but at the time I loved Jack more" I shook my head at her and sat back. She split us up over that Jackass and what did he do? Leave.

"So what you spent the whole nine months cheating on Dad?" I asked not realising that I called Lucas Dad for the first time.

"No. We were only together for three months before I came back"

"Three months and you are so madly I love with him! Ha!"

Another deep breath but I noticed that her face twisted in pain slightly as she inhaled. "When you fall in love you will understand" I rolled my eyes at her and looked out of the widow.

"Izzie the day before Jack and I came to Tree Hill he proposed to me and I wanted us to be a family" Mum whispered, hoarsely before taking another deep breath using the mask.

"Well you saw how that turned out. We were all fine but you had to have to ruin everything. If you hadn't of left you would have never had met Jack and we would all be a family. Me, you and Lucas"

Mum shook her head and took a deep rasping breath before removing the mask. "I slowly started to stop loving Lucas so even if I had stayed we wouldn't have been happy" She explained. I regarded her and could see the pain in her eyes.

"I'm sorry I left" She said breathlessly after a silence feel on us. I frowned wondering if she was Ok. She seems to be in pain and the mask doesn't seem to be helping. "I love you very much. You are my life" My heart dropped and I looked away. Every time I come to see her she tells me she loves me like it will be our last visit which always makes me cry.

I took a deep breath and asked a question that has been eating at me for a while. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Another deep rasping breath "I was afraid you would be angry at me and blame me when really it is my fault. I left and didn't come back for a long time. That is why I wanted to take you from Lucas so I could make up for lost time and never leave you again" She started to sob quietly. I got up and hugged her gently trying to tell her that I forgive her.

"You were sad and needed to get better. I understand" I whispered, my voice failing me. Mum let go off me and wiped the tears that started to roll down my face.

"Take care of yourself baby and Lucas too" I nodded as I kissed her forehead. She lent her head forwards and rested her forehead against mine. I let out a sob and kissed her one last time before I left.

**

* * *

**

I parked the car silently and looked over at Izzie. She wiped her eyes and got out quickly. I should be use to her crying when we go to visit Amy but she is more upset then usual. I wanted to go see Amy myself but it started feeling guilty about the kiss Lucas and I shared. I don't know how Amy feels about him since we never talked about him and after hearing Lucas tell Izzie about their past he sounded like he still has feelings for her too but I had to go and kiss him didn't I! I groaned and lent my head against the steering wheel as the memory of that kiss entered my mind and my heart started to ache, long for him.

"I am so screwed!" I told myself as I got out of the car and started to walk to my house but here I am opening his front door and shutting it behind me. I took a deep breath and walked into the kitchen and came face to face with Lucas. We both stood staring at each other for a moment before I looked away first and sat at the table silently. My heart raced and a twenty tonne elephant dropped into the room making it very hard for me to concentrate on not staring at him. He is avoiding me for some reason and I looked down at the table for a moment trying to figure out why. _Like the table really has the answers_ I thought to myself.

"Who was that man?" He asks. I look up to see he has his back to me and I noticed straightaway how rigid his back is_. What man? _I thought Then it hit me. He saw me this morning but why is he so angry and why was he watching me?

"You've been spying on me?" I asked getting annoyed myself.

"You've been avoiding me!" I scoffed and stood up. I have actually being avoiding him but he doesn't need to know that. He turned around and faced me with a face of thunder. _Why the hell is he so mad?_ The man he saw me with is my new room mate and is gay for God sake! It's not like I am attracted to him!

"What is your problem?"

"Me! You're the one going around hugging people after… we kiss!" He snapped, lowing his voice about the kiss part. I stared at him for a moment before bursting out laughing. He is sounding like a child.

"Don't laugh at me!" He growled, folding his arms across his chest. It was like watching Izzie during one of her temper tantrums. I bit down on my bottom lip to try and hold in my laughter and walked over to him.

"Lucas look-"

"No you look. I like you… a lot. I mean I have all these new feeling for you that I never knew I had and I love having you around to look after Izzie or teach me how to use the washing machine. I need you in my life Peyton" He smiled a little and took hold of my hand. I looked up at him and into his eyes, immediately feeling a spark, an urge that is telling me to just kiss him like my life depended on it and never let go but I decided to let him finish. "I know we hardly know each other and you're a beautiful girl you could have anyone you want… I just want to tell you that I'm falling for you-"I couldn't take it any longer and lent forward to kiss him. His lips moved with mine seamlessly while his hands cupped my cheeks. I wrapped my arms around his neck to deepen the kiss and let him know that I feel the same way.

I pulled away slowly and laid small kisses on his lips. "That guy you saw with me this morning, Jordan is my new room mate. I am renting out my spare room and he is my friend's brother and gay" I explained. Lucas who had wrapped his arms round my waist laughed and rested his head against my shoulder in embarrassment. I laughed at him and snaked my arms around his back, holding him close to me.

**

* * *

**

Home. No matter where you are or what you are doing a piece of your hometown and the people in it is always with you. It is part of you. I put my hands in my denim jacket pockets and took in my surroundings smelling the salty sea, seeing the familiar sights. Nothing has changed and it feels like I never left.

I pulled open the door, wanting to see one person. The only person who can make me feel at home again. The bell above the door chimed and I chuckled. Nothing has changed. Her eyes looked up and met mine, a smile immediately come to my face.

"Keith" She whispered. Karen hasn't aged at all and still is the beautiful, independent woman I have always known. Tears came to her eyes and I pulled her into a loving hug.

"Hello Karen" I replied. "I've missed you"

**AN/ Keith is back yeah! And Luke confessed his feeling to Peyton! All is good….. For now (devious grin) Lol. Also I'm sorry I took so long to update I start College soon and I had to go to the induction days plus I've been playing bball like everyday! Blame Obie for that! I'll try and update by Monday or Tuesday hopefully. **

**Reviews and Suggestions are always welcome **

**Deanie**


	9. The Sharp Hint Of New Tears

**AN/ Hello Darling (anyone who watches Little Britain will understand)! I can't say thank you enough to everyone who reviews and helps with my bad grammar. I apologize in advance. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with One Tree Hill or any of the characters associated with the show. The characters you don't recognise are of my imagination. I also don't own Dashboard Confessional or their song The Sharp Hint Of New Tears either. **

"Keith, your back… but why?" A confused Karen asked

I laughed and followed her into the kitchen. "I've been away long enough. Aren't you happy to see me?" She quickly put the coffee pot on the counter and hugged me tightly. I have been in and out of Tree Hill for seven years but I was away for a whole year in search of my ex-fiancée and just to get away from everything.

"Of course I am. I've missed you too" It felt good to be hugged by Karen again. I pulled her closer to me for a moment, taking her in before pulling her away and smiling at her. I have missed her and Lucas every day I was away. They are the main reason I came back. They are my family.

"How is Lucas?" I asked. It still annoys me that they are not talking but I hope that in my year of absence they have been able to work things out. Karen let go off me and walked over to coffee pot, obviously stalling.

"He moved to New Jersey to look after Izzie"

"He what?" I replied shocked. _Since when did Amy let Lucas look after Izzie?_ I thought. The last I heard Lucas, Amy and Jack had a fight and he decided to stay away after Izzie got very distraught. I remember how upset he had been for weeks on end.

"Amy has lung cancer and asked Lucas took take care of Izzie so he did. He moved up to New Jersey with her and Peyton but that's all I know" I watched as Karen walked out of the kitchen at the sound of the bell tingling. I followed and came face to face with Dan Scott. I have no idea what has got into the man but the whole "supportive, loving" Dan is just plain weird and I don't believe it for a second.

"Keith!" Dan exclaimed when he noticed me leaning against the counter. He walked over to me with a friendly smile that gave me the creeps and gave me a bear hug.

"Good to see you too, Danny" I said trying to get him off me. He patted my back which reminded me a lot of Dad and let go.

"What can I get you Dan?" Karen asked. I watched Dan turn to Karen and smiled a genuine smile, nothing like the creepy one he flashed me_. I see Dan still has a soft spot for Karen_ I though to myself.

"The usual please" She nodded and walked over to the fridge. "So big brother come talk to me. How have you been?" I sighed and pushed myself off the counter and took a seat beside him.

"I've been good little brother" He nodded and returned his attention to Karen.

"You'll have to come by and see Jamie he is growing up so fast" Dan explained and smiled that creepy smile again. I started to wonder how long it took him to learn how to do it. Karen returned and gave Dan a bottle of Orange Juice.

"Thank you" She smiled at him and walked away again. Dan's eyes never let her and it started to annoy me.

"You had your chance Danny boy" I whispered. He tensed and looked over at me. For a split second I saw the old, selfish Dan Scott in his eyes but it went as quickly as it came and that creepy smile returned.

"Here you go Dan" Karen said placing a take-out bag in front of him. She looked over at me and smiled before turning back to Dan. I smiled back as Dan paid her. She quickly looked over the money and shook her head.

"Every time Dan" She said, giving him back 5. Dan faked being embarrassed and stood up, picking up his drink and bag.

"Well it was nice seeing you Karen" He smiled at Karen then turned to me. "And you Keith. It's good to have you back" I nodded my head at him not believing he meant it at all. "Bye" He turned on his heel and walked over to the door.

**

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"Izzie get up!" I shouted as I left the bathroom. It is her first day back at school and if she doesn't get up right now she will be late. It doesn't help that I have to take her and I have no idea where her school is.

"Izzie!" I heard Peyton shout. My heart leapt and a smile came to my face. I walked over to the stairs to see her standing on the bottom step. She smirked at me when she saw me standing there.

"I'm up!" An annoyed Izzie shouted from her room. I looked away from Peyton to see her walk out of her bedroom slowly, growling at me as she did and walked into the bathroom. I laughed and walked down the stairs, my eyes never leaving Peyton's. When I got to the bottom step we both stared at each other for a second before crashing our lips together. She giggled and pulled me into the Living room.

"Morning" I said in between kisses.

"Morning" I chuckled and wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her closer.

"Couldn't keep away I see" I teased.

"I come to drop Izzie off at school before I go work actually"

"So your not here to see me?" I asked, pretending to be hurt.

"Nope" I started pouting and kissed her neck. "That won't work on me"

"No? How abut this?" I started nibbling on her ear a little, watching her reaction. I laughed when her eyes closed and she bit down on her bottom lip.

"Wouldn't work huh?" I teased taking a step back. She opened her eyes and once she realised what I had done she playfully slapped me. I laughed harder and was about to kiss her when I heard Izzie storm down the stairs. I took a few steps back and tried to hide the smirk I have on my face. Peyton looked over at me and wiped my lip a little. I took hold of hand and pulled her closer to me, placing a soft kiss on her lips before letting go and walking into the kitchen. Izzie stood by the island eating what looks like porridge and mumbled something to me.

"Huh?" She rolled her eyes and swallowed her mouthful.

"Dinner money"

"Oh" I went into my jean pockets in search of the change I had in there yesterday.

"Here. Your Dad isn't on the ball is he?" Peyton teased as she gave Izzie a 5 dollar bill. Izzie smiled at her and pocketed it quickly. I looked over at Peyton and frowned at her playfully. She stuck her tongue out me before looking at the clock.

"We gotta go" She said to Izzie. Izzie nodded and put her bowl in the sink then hugged me goodbye.

"Have a good day at school" I told her. She nodded and let go and walked out of the kitchen leaving me and Peyton alone. I looked over at her with a mischievous grin but she shook her head at me and left.

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"Ok you're freaking me out. What are you so happy about?" Izzie asked from her seat at the kitchen table. She has just returned from school.

"What? Can't I be happy?"

"Yeah you can but you've had that giddy smirk on you face since this morning so what's going on?" I turned back to the paper I was reading to try and avoid the question but Izzie continued anyway.

"Oi! Don't avoid me!" I laughed and raised the paper higher so it covered my face. She laughed with me and stood up so she can see my face again. "Fine I give up! I've got stuff to do anyway" She stuck her tongue out at me and left the kitchen. I looked at the clock and got up to get the frozen pizza out of the freezer.

"Frozen! No we gotta make your own!" I looked over at the door to see Peyton standing in the doorway. I smirked at her and turned around fully.

"You want me to make a pizza from scratch?" I asked. She pulled off her coat and dropped it on the chair then walked over to me slowly. I fought with myself to not just jump her here and now.

"Not from scratch like kneading the dough and so on but… look I'll help Ok"

I stood up straight and took a step towards her. "Ok" I lent forward to kiss her but she quickly moved to the right. "That's not nice!" She giggled and kissed my cheek.

"I'll go and get some ingredients" I watched her leave the kitchen, the smile never leaving my face. I looked at the frozen pizza in my hand and put it back in the freezer then searched the fridge for ingredients too.

"We can have a cheese and tomato pizza with bacon, sausage and peppers… or my favourite with pickles or baloney" She announced when she returned. I laughed when I saw her arms full. It looked like she raided her fridge.

"That is wrong!" I exclaimed remembering that she said pickles on her pizza is her favourite.

"Hey, don't knock it till you try it!" I laughed and stayed quiet. "I also found a pizza base which is good but I couldn't find any tomato puree"

"Oh… I can go get some" I volunteered.

"Aww! Your sweet but Amy might have some. We were always making pizza together" She walked over to me and put the ingredients on the counter before searching the cupboards. I looked over the items again and pulled a face at the pickles.

"Ah! Found it!"

"Good. Let's start then" We both walked over to the sink and washed our hands. I flicked her with water a few times which resulted in her soaking me and I had to go and change my shirt. When I returned she had already started to spread the tomato puree on the base.

"Looking good" I complimented over her shoulder. The base is completely covered now.

"Why thank you. The pizza is looking tasty too" I laughed and wrapped my arms around her waist then started to place light kisses on her neck.

"Lucas" She started to complain as she put down the cheese.

"Peyton" I replied. She shook her head at me and turned around. "You know you love it!" Her eyes met mine and chills started to run up and down my spine. She smiled at me as I lent forward. The next thing I know there is cheese in my mouth and Peyton is laughing her head off at me.

"Thanks!" I said eating the huge slice of cheese she put in my mouth.

"Your welcome" She replied as she stood up straight and kissed me lightly. I cupped her cheek and deepened the kiss. Her hands wrapped around my neck and she started to play with the hairs on the back of my neck. The phone rung in the distance but I couldn't care less because I am relishing in the feelings that Peyton brings out of me, the strong connection between us that is telling me that I am falling hard for her.

"D-D-Dad!" We both jumped apart at the desperate cries of Izzie. She entered the room moments later and fell to the floor in a state. Tears streaming down her face as she cried hysterically. We were both at her side in moments and I pulled her into a hug. She sobbed loudly and buried her head in my chest. I held onto her tightly wondering what could possibly make her so upset.

"Omigod Izzie what's wrong?" Peyton asked rubbing her back. She didn't answer she just held onto my polo shirt tighter. Peyton looked at me with fearful eyes and continued to rub her back slowly before she noticed the discarded phone lying by Izzie feet. She looked back at me before picking it up and putting it to her ear gingerly. I regarded her hoping that it would hold the answers to my daughter's distress.

"Hello?" Peyton said. She went silent as she listened to who ever was on the other end but her face suddenly drop and she put her hand over her mouth in shock as tears come to her eyes. My heart thumped faster as her eyes met mine.

"…Amy… passed on" Peyton whispered as she burst out in tears too. It felt like someone smashed something into my chest, winding me instantly because I couldn't quite catch my breath. I watched Peyton for a moment before pulling her into a hug too. She wrapped her arms around my neck and cried on my shoulder and it wasn't long before I broke down in tears too.

**AN/ Two updates in one day :O I told you the good times wouldn't last. Next chapter is the funeral and should be up… Monday-ish, hopefully sooner. **

**Reviews and Suggestions are always welcome **

**Deanie**


	10. Broken Sunday

**AN/ Well funerals… I personally dislike funerals but I attempted to write one anyway. Thank you for the reviews and helping with my bad grammar. I apologize in advance. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with One Tree Hill or any of the characters associated with the show. The characters you don't recognise are of my imagination. I also don't own Saliva or their song Broken Sunday (I love this song) either. **

The funeral rolled around quickly, a little too quickly if you asked me but it wasn't like I could avoid it. Amy's parents arranged everything which I am so thankful for because I don't think I could handle it as selfish as that sounds. I am more worried about Izzie. She cries a lot and is very quiet. Peyton and I haven't left her side since we heard the news five days before and we comfort her every time she cries but I wish I could help her, take her pain away.

I rolled onto my back and put my hands behind my head. Izzie is lying to my right sleeping restlessly while Peyton is lying to my left, turning every ten to fifteen seconds in her sleep. Yes I have been counting it takes my mind of what today is. The day after we heard the news Izzie crawled into my bed in the middle of the night in tears. Peyton hearing Izzie crying joined us too and every night since we all have slept in my bed.

I groaned in frustration and sat up, knowing that I won't be getting any sleep any time soon so I might as well get breakfast going. _Now how am I going to get out of bed?_ I thought to myself but a moment later Peyton rolled into me and woke herself up.

She looked up at me sleepily "Sorry" She whispered, blushing a little.

"It's fine. I was up anyway" She nodded and sat up to check on Izzie. I tensed as she lent over me slightly but she noticed it immediately and sat back. An awkward silence soon followed and I hoped that Izzie would wake up and break it.

"I… Er... Will get breakfast started" She stuttered as she got out of bed and made her way to the door.

"Yeah… I'll be down in a minute" I replied. She nodded and opened the bedroom door.

I exhaled and run my hand through my hair. Ever since we heard the news things have been weird between Peyton and I and I don't know what to do about it. I looked down at Izzie's sleeping form before getting up and joining Peyton is the kitchen.

She stood by the oven holding a frying pan and wearing a pair of dark blue PJ bottoms and a black vest top, her hair wilder then usual. I walked over to the coffee machine and turned it on.

"I don't actually know why I'm making breakfast. Izzie wont want to eat anything and I'm not hungry. How about you? She asked turning to me. I shook my head and with a sigh she put the frying pan back and sat at the table with her back to me. I watched as she wringed her hands together.

"Stop watching me Lucas" I looked away immediately and at the coffee machine, feeling like an idiot. I took my black coffee and sat opposite her. I tried not to meet her eyes as she watched me but it was like having an itch and fighting not to scratch it. Our eyes met and I froze.

"Morning" Peyton said cheerfully a few minutes later. I turned to see an exhausted Izzie. She didn't reply. She just took a seat beside Peyton, head in hands. Peyton rubbed her back slowly. Izzie smiled weakly at her and stood up.

"Where you going Izzie?"

"To get ready" Both Peyton and my eyes met in worried expressions.

"I'm fine. Stop doing that!" Izzie snapped as she left. I exhaled and drunk the rest of my coffee.

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Churches. We have a love/hate relationship. I use to love going to Sunday school when I was younger and I made a few friends there but now looking up at the grand old church that towed over us menacingly I'm starting to despise it for the simple fact that we are all here for my mother's funeral.

I bit down hard on my bottom lip to stop the waterfall of tears just waiting to flow. Peyton stood beside me doing the same. To anyone who doesn't know her personally you would think that she is calm and collected but I know that on the inside she is breaking and just putting on this front that she has to hide her pain. I also know that she hates churches along with hospitals since her Grandfather, both her birth Mother and adopted Mother and now her best friend have all passed away. _At least she knows what I'm going through_ I thought to myself as I snaked my hand into hers. She looked down at me and smiled weakly at me.

"Iz" I turned around to see Aaron standing there. He is wearing a black suit and tie with a white shirt; his dark brown hair is much shorter and is brushed back when usually he has it spiked or he is wearing one of his many hats. His light green eyes met mine and I had to fight back a sob. He took a step forward and wrapped his arms around me tightly. I waited for the safe, calming feeling that usually washes over me when he hugs me but it didn't. I closed my eyes fighting back more tears._ Damn tears!_ I thought.

Hearing Aaron's parents and older brother greet Lucas brought me back to reality. I let go off Aaron and looked down at the floor, not wanting to look him in the eyes again.

"Izzie" I looked up to see Haley, Nathan, Jamie, Skills, Mouth, Bevin, Dan and two men I didn't know. Haley stepped forward first and hugged me, telling me she was sorry. Nathan who had just hugged Lucas moved on to me next then Skill's. They both told me they are sorry as well and I had to fight back the growing resentment for that word. I've already heard it eleven times and it does not help.

"Izzie this Junk and Fergie" Lucas said. He looks terrible with a solemn face and sad eyes but I turned to the two men and shook all of their hands silently. They all sent me that sympathetic, pity smile like I just lost my dog or something. I looked away quickly before I rolled my eyes at them. Dan walked over lastly and bent down to my level with open his arms. I step into him and let him hug me tightly. He was the only person who didn't say that he is sorry or sent me that smile or worse that "you poor girl" look.

"We better go in" Nathan said. Dan let go off me and smiled a small smile before standing up. Everyone started walking towards the church but I grabbed Aaron's arm to stop him.

"Sit with me" He nodded and we caught up with the others. I kept my focus on the floor when we entered the church so I didn't have to meet everyone's sorry eyes and the coffin that is sitting up front. I took a deep breath and watched Lucas sit down first, Peyton sat next then me and finally Aaron. I didn't know where to look. I can't look up front because I'll have to look at the coffin. I can't look at Peyton because she is crying already and I can't look at Aaron because he keeps sending me encouraging smiles that aren't helping. I started to shift in my seat, trying to fight anxiousness that is starting to build up; along with this throbbing headache that I have from lack of sleep, the constant heartache and empty feeling that I have since Mum died, my sore eyes from crying, my sore nose... I'm just both psychically and mentally tired. I was very thankful when the priest started to speak because I can focus on him.

By the time the ceremony was over I had to take deep breaths to control the built up emotions that I have been trying to hold in. Aaron looked over at me and placed his hand over mine. I linked our fingers and watched as four men stood and picked up the coffin. _The coffin that is holding my Mother_ ran through my mind. A sob got caught in my throat and I lent forward to try and get rid of the claustrophobic feeling that started to attack my chest.

"Iz are you Ok?" I didn't answer. I couldn't. A hand touched my shoulder and I sat up slowly. The coffin was half way down the isle and silent tears started to run down my face. Aaron squeezed my hand gently and I felt Peyton's hand on my shoulder but I wish they would just leave me alone so I can get out of here before my chest exploded.

"L-Let me out" I told Aaron through sobs. The coffin has left the church and people have started to leave. He did as he was told and I quickly squeezed past him and out into the isle but he held onto my hand. I pushed him away, refusing to look at him. I managed to slip my hand out of his and I quickly made my way through the crowd of people and out into the open.

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I watched as Izzie practically ran out of the church with that Aaron guy in tow. I wanted to go after her and hold her but I need to stop crying first. I took a hacked breath and stood. Most people have already left the church and the few people that remain are sending me small nods and sympathetic smiles. I wiped my eyes and nodded back or mouthed thank you. Peyton who is still sobbing stood up too. I took her hand again and started to run my thumb up and down hers slowly. Ever since we sat down I have been trying to comfort her but they only way I could think of is by holding her hand. It didn't help much but I tried. She held onto my hand tightly as she wiped her eyes and joined the crowd of people leaving the church with me behind her.

I inhaled through my nose as we stepped outside and let the relief wash over me. I don't think I could stay in the church any longer. I don't think anyone could. Peyton turned to face me and lent her head against my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around her and she started to cry again. I had to fight tears myself.

"Luke" I looked to right to see Keith standing there. I had to blink a few times just to make sure I wasn't seeing things but there he stood smiling at me. He looks good and hasn't changed on bit.

"Keith" I exclaimed as a few tears rolled down my face. Peyton let go off me and looked over at him too.

"Hey. I'm sorry" I nodded and hugged him but when I looked behind Keith I saw Karen standing there. She looked over at me with glassy eyes and I started to get angry.

"What are you doing here?" I snapped. She flinched and looked away.

"Luke-"

"Did you bring here?" I shouted at Keith. Everyone looked over us but I didn't care. She has no right to be here. She never liked Amy in the first place.

"Luke she's here for you" Keith tried to explain. I glared at him but I knew that he would defend her he always does.

"I don't want her here! Just go home you're not welcome" I shouted at her before storming off. I walked over to the car park and lent against someone's Jeep for a moment before I started to pace. I can't believe she is here! She has no right for a start and he has no right to bring her!

"Lucas" I heard Peyton call. I walked around the side of the Jeep so she could see me. She walked over and took my hand in hers. I looked into her eyes and started to feel guilty for making a scene.

"I'm sorry I just can't believe that she is here-"

She cupped my cheek. "Luke-"

"-She shouldn't be here" I tried to explain.

She smiled a little and kissed me delicately. "It's Ok" I smiled back and put my hands around her waist. I saw someone standing a foot away out of the corner of my eye and looking over I realised it is a distraught Izzie. She looked at me through irritated eyes then looked at Peyton.

"Izzie" Peyton tried to say but Izzie shook her head and walked away.

**AN/ Well it took me like a day and a half to decided how to play this out since a suggestion was made and I couldn't make up my mind so in the end I decided to do both. You'll have to tell me if this chapter was any good or not and I should have an update either tomorrow or the day after. I know what I need to write I just need to write it… if that made sense lol **

**Reviews and Suggestions are always welcome **

**Deanie**


	11. I Just Don’t Know What To Do With Myself

**AN/ Thank you for the reviews and helping with my bad grammar. I apologize in advance. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with One Tree Hill or any of the characters associated with the show. The characters you don't recognise are of my imagination. I also don't own The White Stripes or their song I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself (funny but sick tune) either. **

I choose to ignore him as he called after me. I'd rather just be left alone to think everything through and process the fact that my Mother just died, that my father and my big sister are a couple… I think, I guess.

I groaned in frustration and stopped walking up this ridiculously steep street. I don't even know what is going on with them two. Are they in love? Is it just a fling? Were they going to tell me? How long have they been together?

"I was calling you" An exhausted Aaron said bringing me out of thoughts. He bent down and held onto his side, gulping in big breaths.

"Aaron you know I love you and all but will you just leave me alone to just process everything. Please?" I patted his shoulder and carried on walking, knowing that he would follow anyway.

"Like that… actually works!" He grabbed hold of my arm to slow down. "Come on you know you can talk to me about anything" I managed to get a good look at him and felt quiet bad for making him run up this steep street after me.

"Yeah I know but I just need to think"

"Fine but I'm coming with you" He started to walk up the street again. I shook my head and walked in step with him, heading to our favourite spot.

* * *

Dialling her mobile number again I put the phone to my ear just to hear the woman say that she has turned off her phone again. I shut my phone and looked at it for a moment before groaning and running my hand through my hair sending it back to its messy state. I don't even know where Izzie is, no one does and it worries me. I keep imagining her alone and crying her eyes out and it kills me when I could be comforting her. I hope she isn't mad about me and Peyton and is punishing us. We wanted to tell her but there has never been a good time.

"We need to split up and find her" Keith announced. I nodded and scanned the crowd for Peyton. She is looking for Aaron for information to Izzie's whereabouts while me, Keith and Karen stand around like lemons.

"I can't find him which means he is with her. Amy's parents are going to lead everyone to their house for the wake but I think we should split up and look for Izzie and Aaron" Peyton explained when she returned.

"That's what Keith said" I replied. I can feel myself staring to get antsy and if I don't find her soon I know I'll start shouting at people and that's all we need. I walked over to Peyton wanting to look with her but Keith took me to the side and away from Karen and Peyton.

"Look go with your Mother-"

"No way!" I shouted.

"Lucas! You can't avoid each other for ever over a stupid fight you had thirteen years ago. Don't you think it has been long enough?" I lent against the wall and sighed. I know Keith wont give up and we could argue till I'm blue in the face but all I want to do is find Izzie. I growled slightly and nodded.

"Fine but only because I want to find my daughter" I snapped as I walked over to Peyton. She looked up at me slowly "I have to go with Karen but Keith will look after you Ok" She nodded but I could tell she is on the verge of tears again. I took her hand and linked our fingers, pulling her closer to me gently. She lent her head against my shoulder and I could feel tears start to soak through my shirt. My heart dropped and I pulled her into a bear hug.

"Well find her I promise" I whispered in her ear. She nodded slightly and kissed me quickly before walking over to Keith. He smiled at her and I watched them walk off in the opposite direction. I ignored the sinking feeling in my chest and started to walk out of the car park with Karen in tow. When we got onto the street I looked up and down it confused. I know I'm going to get lost since I hardly know Bridgeton.

"I think we should walk up the street" Karen said beside me. I looked up and down the street again, fighting the urge to rebel and go down the street but after a few seconds I started to walk up it. Karen was by my side in seconds. I sneaked a look at her and I have to say that she looks terrible. Her eyes are puffy she has worry lines in her forehead; her whole body language is telling me she is worried. She looked over at me and our eyes met and to my surprise I didn't feel angry. I felt comfortable and calm with her. I looked away first and concentrated on walking up this absurdly steep street.

"You love her don't you" I stopped walking and looked over at her with a frown. I didn't know who she is on about Peyton? Izzie? Amy?

"Peyton" The question stopped me for a moment. I have strong feelings for her and I am falling for her… A smile came to my face as I started to realise that I do love her. Karen chuckled and started to walk again. I laughed myself and caught up.

"It's nice to talk to you again and not fight all the time"

"Whose fault is that" I replied shoving my hands in my trousers pockets.

"I'm sorry Luke. I should have stuck by you and helped you through everything, especially when you needed me the most but I was so angry and after we had that fight… I shouldn't have let it drag on for so long" She explained and I could tell that she meant it.

"But that doesn't change the fact that it happened"

"I know and I am so sorry for not believing in you and telling you that you were a mistake when you were anything but. You're my life Lucas and no matter how angry I was I couldn't deny the fact that I love you dearly" She started tearing up and I looked away, processing everything she just said. It took me a while to realise that I still love her, that I missed her. We walked in silence for a while.

"Izzie is a splitting image of you Luke" I nodded, a smirk present on my face.

"She is now but she has always looked like Amy" My heart dropped as I remembered that Amy died. Izzie has been on my mind for the last hour.

Thinking of Amy I turned to Karen and asked. "Why do you dislike Amy so much?"

"I went to school with her parents and they were always snobs who looked down at me especially when I had you out of wedlock. I just assumed Amy was the same"

"She was never like that! If you ever took the time to get to know her you would have figured it out yourself" I snapped.

"I'm sorry Luke. I wish I did get to know her and Izzie too. I still remember when she was three and she feel off the monkey bars" She smiled at me.

"I was so angry at you that day and I didn't want you to get to know her since you was against the pregnancy. I was just being stubborn I guess" I said looking away and around us, only just noticing that we have reached the top of the road and are half way down another.

"I deserved it. I did try and talk to you that day and make everything right but I could see that we were going to argue and I didn't want to argue in front of Izzie so I dropped it" I nodded and smiled at her thankful that we didn't argue that day. Amy and I had started arguing and she didn't need Karen and I arguing too. I was about to start walking again when my phone rang. I quickly took it out of my pocket and answered.

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I chose to sit on the grass and lean against the closest tree trunk to put some space between me and Aaron. We are sitting in a clearing of a small forest on the outskirts of town where we come to climb trees or just get away. No one knows we are here and the only people who are around are a local soccer team but they are at least fifty feet away so it is just me, Aaron and sometimes Zoë and I love it.

I watched as Aaron stood up and pulled off his tie and jacket and hung them from the closest branch. He hasn't taken his eyes off me since I sat down like he is expecting me to evaporate into thin air or something. It is really annoying but I don't want to shout at him. He is the only person I can trust right now. There is Peyton but I feel like I can't tell her everything since she was best friends with my Mum and is now going out with Lucas although the fact that they are together isn't that bad. Lucas is better then most of her previous boyfriends and I like Peyton better then that Brooke woman.

"Are you Ok now?" Aaron asked. I looked over at him and nodded. I have been blocking out thought of my Mum since we arrived and it was working till now. I wiped my eyes angrily and stood up, kicking broken branches on the floor. The empty feeling in my chest grew.

"Izzie?" My head snapped up and I looked over to see Peyton and another man walk around the trees and over to me. Peyton started sobbing and hugged me tightly. I stood there confused wondering how she found me. No one knows about this place unless she has been following me or someone told.

"Omigod Izzie" I looked ahead to see Lucas walking towards me too._ What the hell?_ I thought to myself. He pulled me and Peyton into a bear hug and kissed my forehead. And I stood there still confused.

"Don't you ever scare me like that again!" Lucas snapped before pulling me into another hug. I looked over at Aaron for help but he stood at a distance playing with his tie which means only one thing. He is hiding something.

"Everything's Ok" I heard Lucas say. I watched as he hugged a weeping Peyton and that's when it hit me like a ton of bricks. Aaron told them where I was. My eyes started to sting but I ignored them and stomped over to him.

"How could you!" I shouted. He flinched and kept his eyes on the floor.

"I had to they were worried sick about you "He feebly explained. I stated at him, shocked that he grassed on me. I thought I could trust him and he would just let me cool down before he told them where I was. I just cant believe he told them our secret place. I shook my head at him and started to walk away but he grabbed my arm to stop me.

I turned to him, feeling so betrayed "I-I can't even look at you right now" I simply said, yanking my arm out his grip and walking away.

**AN/ I'm not to sure about this chapter so you'll have to tell me if it sucked. I got stuck writing it and I keep getting distracted by ideas for new Fic's. That reminds me I need help with writing poems, well verses so if anybody is good with that sorta thing PM me and I'll get back to you. **

**Deanie**


	12. Outta my System

**AN/ This is the last chapter but I forget to mention it before sorry. Thank you everyone who read and reviewed plus Anniecakes13 and Leytonlover3 for helping me with my bad grammar. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with One Tree Hill or any of the characters associated with the show. The characters you don't recognise are of my imagination. I also don't own Bow Wow (although I wish I did) or his song Outta My System or My Chemical Romance and their song's The End or Famous Last Word either. **

Seventy four hours and forty five minutes or thee days, two hours and forty five minutes, how ever you look at it. That is how long I have been awake and sitting in my room silently crying on my bed. Well I have been crying for the last twenty four hours ever since I was lying in bed and it suddenly hit me. My Mum is dead and since then I haven't been able to stop crying. Peyton and Lucas have both tried to console me but they just make me cry even more.

I tried to sleep in Luke's bed with Peyton like before the funeral but the tears won't stop and this empty feeling won't go away so I sit here watching the minutes turn into hours, the nights turn into days doing nothing at all. I don't want to do anything. I just try to work out all of these feeling that rush through me. The most dominant emotion is depression which is followed closely by the empty feeling and lastly the feeling that I am alone which is true since I don't talk to Aaron and Lucas doesn't understand. Peyton has tried but she just reminds me of Mum and I start to cry all over again.

My alarm clock started to beep beside me. I looked over to see that it is seven am. I lent over and pressed the snooze button before lying back down again. I looked up at the ceiling but my eyes unfocused and it all turned into one big blur while The End by My Chemical Romance played in the background for the seventh time.

My alarm beeped again and looking over it said ten past seven. I sat up shocked that I've been lying here for ten minutes without releasing it. I shook my head and with a sigh I got up and turned off the alarm.

I walked out of my room quietly and snuck over to Luke's room. His door is open half way and I looked inside to see both Lucas and Peyton sleeping snugly together. A small smile comes to my face and I shut the door quietly behind me. At first I was shocked and kinda annoyed that there are together but I have to admit I like them as a couple they are so goofy and crazy about each other. And watching them together even from the first day he moved into this house I knew that there is something between them. It was only a matter of time before they realised it.

I closed my bedroom door behind me and changed the song to Famous Last Words before walking over to my wardrobe. I need to get out of this room and since it is Tuesday I'll go to school. I grabbed a plain red T-shirt and my black tight jeans and placed them on my bed. When I walked back to my wardrobe the snow globe that sat by my chest of draws caught my eye. I gingerly walked over to it and picked it up. My Mum brought me a statue of Liberty snow globe when she was in New York three years ago. I held it tightly in my hands and shook it to make the little pieces of glitter swirl around in the water.

"Oh you're up" I jumped at the sound of Lucas' voice and ended up dropping the snow globe. I watched as it smashed into little pieces and the water drained from it pooling around my feet.

"Omigod are you Ok?" He exclaimed running over to me. I nodded, staring down at the globe but the weird thing was it didn't upset me like I thought it would. I didn't even care it just calmed me and stopped me from feeling so empty.

"Izzie look at me" I reluctantly looked away from the smashed globe and up at Lucas. He watched me with fear in his eyes. I blinked quickly and smiled at him. A genuine smile as I realised that I didn't care anymore. I still love my Mum more then life itself and there isn't one minute that I don't think about her but I don't want to feel depressed anymore so I won't. I know that she wouldn't want me to mope around forever.

"I'm fine" I chuckled and looked back at the smashed globe before walked over to my bed loving the new found feeling I am having.

"What's going on?" Peyton asked. She stood by the door in her dressing gown.

"Nothing Lucas is freaking" I smiled over at her.

"I am not. She dropped the snow globe and smiled about it" Lucas argued, smirking at me.

"Now Luke that is nothing to freak about it was an accident right?" Peyton asked me. I nodded. "See chill" Lucas chuckled and walked over to Peyton, taking hold of the dressing gown and leaning in to kiss her but she moved her head out of the way and looked down to the floor. I chuckled and sat on my bed.

"Wh- "He started to say but Peyton nodded her head in my direction and he immediately got the picture.

"Don't mind me" I joked. They laughed and Lucas turned to face me. "And anyway will you leave so I can get dressed"

"Dressed?"

"I'm going to school" I explained. They both looked at each other, sharing a worried look.

"Will you stop doing that? I'm fine and I want to go to school so shoo" I teased pushing them both out the door.

**

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**

Coughing a little I knocked on the front door and put my hands in my pockets. _I can never get use to New Jersey weather_ I thought to myself as a chill run up my spine but luckily the door opened to reveal a tired looking Izzie. I regarded her quickly wondering why she was up at quarter past seven in the morning.

"Hi Keith" She greeted, opening the door fully to let me in. I smiled at her and took a step inside. I have only known Izzie for two days but she is the sweetest little thing. I pulled the pack of chewing gum out of my pocket and gave it too her. She smiled brightly at me and hugged me saying thank you. I laughed and followed her into the Living room.

"Morning Izzie. Is your Dad up?" I said as I took a said.

"Yeah but I think he is the shower" I watched as she slumped down into the chair and flicked the channels absently, her eyes glazing over. I can tell from looking at her that she hasn't being sleeping properly and I have noticed the change is her. She is quieter, a lot more closed off.

"So how have you been Izzie?" She dragged my eyes away from the TV and looked over at me. I could tell she is debating with herself to tell me or not but I didn't push her. If she is anything like Lucas she will tell me in her own time.

"Honestly? Well I have insomnia and I feel like crap all the time"

"I'm sorry"

"It's not your fault" She said, looking back over at the TV. A silence fell on us and I wanted to say something supportive but I know nothing I say can stop her from hurting.

"I would like to tell you that it gets better but I've never personally gone through it"

"Peyton told me that the pain never goes away but it eventually stops hurting as much. I don't think I can handle it anymore" I got up and sat beside her, pulling me into a hug. She took a shaky breath, fighting off the tears.

"Do you wanna hear something crazy?" I nodded. "Earlier I was holding a snow globe my Mum brought me but Lucas scared me and I dropped it… but I wasn't upset about it. I can't explain it but it made me realise that I don't want to depressed anymore and should just live everyday like it is my last... like Mum would want me too. It crazy that a smashed snow globe can make me realise that right?"

"That does sound pretty nutty" I joked. She laughed and looked back at the TV. "But that is a good way to look at life. I'm sure your Mum wouldn't want you to mope around forever either. I think you should live your life to the fullest like she would have wanted you to" I replied. She looked up at me and smiled such a beautiful smile.

"I think your right. Thanks Keith" I laughed and she hugged me tightly before getting up. I watched her leave feeling relieved that I managed to help her in some way like I did with Karen and Luke. Those two are the most stubborn people I know and if I hadn't of made them search for Izzie together I don't think they would have talked at all. It took them a while to talk to each other properly and sort everything out but they are getting there.

"Hey Keith!" Lucas called. I got up and walked into the kitchen after him. He looked up at me as he buttoned up the rest of his shirt and as he turned to the coffee machine I could see a lipstick mark visible on the side his neck. I laughed and decided to not tell him that it is there.

"Hello to you too Luke. I just came over to tell you that your mother wants to have a family meal today"

"And you came over at half seven in the morning to tell me this?" He teased giving me a coffee.

"Yes I did! I know you'd be at work today and I needed to warn you before hand"

"Well in that case thank you" A huge smile came to his face and I watched as Peyton walked into the kitchen and smirked at Lucas seductively while she made herself a coffee. He chuckled and leant against a chair, never taking his eyes off her. I shook my head at them both but they were both too lost in each other to notice me or so I thought. Peyton walked over to Lucas but stopped short at the sight of me and blushed.

"Hello Keith"

"Good morning Peyton" I replied. She smiled at me but snuck a look at Lucas before sitting down. Lucas cleared his throat and tried not to look at her every ten seconds. I laughed at them trying to act all innocent when all they reminded me of teenage sweethearts.

**

* * *

**

Keith's words and the smashed globe struck in my mind as I took my normal seat in class and sunk in it a little. Most people know about the funeral and are looking at me with them damn sadden expressions. I smiled at them but after a while I could only manage a nod. That was until I saw Catherine and her group of girls take their seats unluckily for me they all sit around me so there is no escape. I rolled my eyes and looked over at the door only to see Aaron walk in. He stopped when our eyes met but I looked away first.

"Aw, what's wrong Isabella did you and Aaron break up?" Catherine teased. Nothing new there she is always teasing me and Aaron, mostly me. I scowled at her and watched Aaron drop his head and take a seat at the back. He usually sits next to me.

_**Flashback **_

_"Morning Iz" I smiled hearing Aaron's voice. He walked in step with me as we walked to our first class. _

_"Morning Aaron" He chuckled but stopped when he saw Catherine and her three bitchy friends standing by the calculus classroom door obviously waiting for us. There goes my perfect morning I thought to myself. Aaron looked over at me and took a deep breath preparing for the worse. I wondered what it would be this time. Being knocked into the lockers? Called names? Death glares? Tripping? _

_Only one way to find out I thought as I walked ahead and tried to get through the Maths door. Catherine tripped me and I lost my balance slightly but managed to remain upright. Catherine and her little mini Catherine's snickered. _

_"What the hell is your problem?" Aaron snapped at Catherine. I know why she is always picking on me but I've always been too afraid to tell anyone just in case Catherine told my big secret. _

_"Oh look Aaron is sticking up for his little girlfriend" I turned around and faced them, begging Aaron to just drop it. _

_"You know me and Izzie are just friends and that is getting really old now Cat" Aaron argued. _

_"Cat? You don't get to call __**me**__ Cat! You little freak!" _

_"Who you-"Aaron argued taking a step forward but I know that he would __**never**__ hit a girl and I wasn't about to let him now. _

_"Aaron leave her she isn't worth it!" I tried to say. He looked at me and sighed pulling his woolly hat off his head and walking away. I watched him leave knowing that he is pissed right about now. Catherine and her friends all laughed. _

_"Go chase after your boyfriend Isabella!" I shook my head at her and turned to walk away when she barged past me and knocked me into a locker. _

_**End of Flashback **_

Everyday Catherine and her friends would say something against us and at least trip one of us up. A whole year of that is enough for anyone.

"Aww look Isabella you upset him!" I looked up at Catherine and smirked at her, sitting forward.

"You know what Catherine I'm sick of you and your crap and its time I stood up to you" I stood up and turned to look at Aaron. Catherine looked at me with worried eyes and watched me in horror as I looked Aaron straight in the face, living up to what Keith and I talked about. Live everyday to the fullest like Mum would want me to.

"Aaron. Ever since the begging of middle school Catherine has liked you and hated the fact that we are… were best friends that's why she picks on us. Everyone Catherine loves Aaron!" I shouted a huge smile on my face. Everyone sat silently waiting for a reaction from Catherine me included. I turned to her and folded my arms across my chest.

"You little cow!" She shouted, standing up and pushing me. I laughed and pushed her back harder. This came to a shock to Catherine, to everyone and I laughed again. I looked around at all their dumbfounded expressions especially Aaron's and grabbed my bag leaving the room.

**

* * *

**

I walked past the numerous grave stones silently. I haven't seen her yet but I know she is here. After eleven years I have this ability to know where she is even if I don't find her the first time. I walked up the little hill and there she was sitting by Amy's grave. I took a deep breath and put my hands into my pockets, walking over to her slowly. She must have noticed me by now or is at least ignoring me.

We both stay silent until I couldn't take it anymore. "What the hell was that?" I ask. The news that Catherine likes me is still a huge shock to me. She laughed and stood up.

"I have no idea. This morning I smashed that Statue of Liberty snow globe Mum brought me and it made me realise that I have to live my life to the fullest like Mum would want me to. So when Catherine started I just… I didn't care anymore. I wasn't afraid of her" She turned to face me. "If that makes sense"

"Not really" I replied. We both started laughing. I regarded her hoping that she has forgiven me or we are at least on good terms.

Our eyes met and she sighs. "Sit with me" I obliged and sat beside her on grass, taking in Amy's grave stone. It is back marble with the words "Here lies Amy Lawson beloved Mother, daughter and sister. She will be missed dearly" Her date of birth and death is carved underneath. She was only thirty two. A lump grew in my throat and I swallowed trying to get rid of it. Amy was so young and was like a second Mum to me. I'll miss her.

"I miss her too" Izzie spoke up. I put my arm around her neck loosely and nodded slightly still choked up from thoughts of Amy. Izzie looked down at the grass by her feet and started to pull blades out of the ground. We stayed this way most of the day until Lucas rang Izzie wondering where she was and telling her to come home.

**

* * *

**

"Where you been Izzie?" Peyton asked when we walked into the kitchen. Izzie looked at me and Peyton smiled at me understanding that I was with her. Like always.

"Are you staying for dinner Aaron?" Lucas asked. I looked at Izzie silently asking her if that was ok.

"Of course he is Luke" Izzie replied. Lucas laughed and placed another plate at the kitchen table. Izzie and I both took a seat.

"Hello everyone!" Karen greeted as she entered the kitchen, Keith by her side.

"Hey Ma" Lucas replied first and gave her a quick hug before taking a plate of delicious looking apple pie off her. "Hey Keith!" Keith hugged him quickly and I laughed. They remind me of my older brother and my Dad. Too manly to give each other hugs. Izzie shook her head at them both and greeted Keith as he sat beside her.

"Nice to see you again Aaron" Keith called to me.

"You too Sir" I replied shyly.

"Sir. I like him" Karen said as she joined us too. I blushed and looked away from her. Izzie laughed and nudged me playfully.

"Ok grubs up!" Lucas announced as he and Peyton brought over numerous plates and bowls that held sliced chicken, a bowl full of rice, roast potatoes, vegetables, stuffing and lastly gravy.

"Grubs up!" Karen repeated, shaking her head at Lucas. He laughed and sat down beside Peyton and everyone started to dig in. I helped myself to the chicken my favourite but decided that I won't have too much of it and dug in. I looked around at the table at everyone as I ate. They all seem so happy even Izzie who has been laughing at Keith and interacting with everyone. Karen who sat opposite me caught my eye as she took a bite out of the chicken and smiled at Lucas.

"So you can cook!" She teased.

He scoffed "What do you except I grew up in that Café something had to rub off" He replied. Karen, Keith and Lucas all laughed while I watched silently confused.

"Hey Aaron" Izzie whispered. I looked over at her just in time to see a pea fly past me. I glared at her playfully and flicked a carrot back but she ducked and it hit Keith instead. Everyone stopped eating and looked over at Keith and then me. I nearly died from embarrassment.

"Aaron" I heard Keith say. I gingerly looked up and ducked as a carrot flew at me. Everyone started laughing and talking again. I even laughed myself and continued to eat my dinner, silently watching the happy family before me.

**AN/ I hope you liked the last chapter I'm a sucker for cheesy endings I guess but I think they all deserved a happy ending. Drop me one last review even if it is good or bad. Also if anybody is good at writing poetry. **

**Deanie**


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